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Did I steal Trump's haircut, or did he steal mine? Either way, it's a cultural appropriation haircut right there. Just call me Joey Reed, a clear case of Trump derangement syndrome in full swing.

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I'm just one person, but remember that only a few thousand votes kept Trump out of office last time. This time, we will hold you personally responsible, Gary. Don't forget to vote, Gary.

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I was asked about Trump becoming speaker and I answered honestly. I think "speaker Trump" sounds great.

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I'm not backing out of the race. I will beat Donald Trump in 2020.

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I don't support Black Lives Matter, but I believe in equality for all. I wear a shirt that says "White Lives Matter" because I love everyone and stand for America. I think it's hypocritical that people can wear BLM shirts but not WLM. I'm against the organization's methods, not the message of valuing black lives. I believe in equality for all races and groups, like Asians and LGBTQ+. I'm rebelling against BLM, not against the idea of valuing black lives.

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Kamala Harris sucks.

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If you're voting for the left, you can express that with bumper stickers on your car. It seems like there's a divide, and I might not have many liberal fans.

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We're not backing down. Trump 2024. The hood supports him. We're not falling for lockdowns or new viruses. We're all in for Trump in 2024.

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Maybe I'm gay, and maybe my wife is a man, but it doesn't matter. Just go out and vote for Kamala. We've already dealt with Joe, so let's focus on winning this thing. We'll figure everything else out later.

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Here I come! Who's number one on the invitation list? Leonardo DiCaprio! That's why I'm voting for Kamala Harris. Got it? Oh, wow!

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If Kamala Harris wins, I'm leaving America. Dropping a diss track on my birthday. Get ready.

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I'm a man. I'm man enough to cry during "The Notebook" and sing show tunes in the shower, even the girl parts. I'm man enough to sit down to pee and write Twilight fan fiction. I can hug another guy without it being weird and compliment a dude at the gym, even giving him a little kiss on the head. I'm man enough to vote for Kamala Harris. Are you man enough?

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We have your back at the White House.

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These people made me quit because they wanted me to support Kamala for president, but I think she's worse than me. I'm asking all Americans to vote for Trump to make America great again. So, get me a MAGA hat, vote Trump, and let's make America great. You know what I mean.

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I used to be a Democrat, but after meeting this man, I won't vote for a Democrat again.

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I'm Barack Obama, not Frank Underwood. Happy April Fools' Day. Frank got it from me.

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I wore a MAGA hat when Joe Biden saw me at the state of the union. They are scared of the hat.

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I dressed up as a "Candace Owens Jew" for Purim, poking fun at stereotypes. I joked about having Christian blood, a Jewish nose, being wealthy, and drinking Christian blood. I ended by wishing everyone a happy Purim.

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Okay, let's talk about the bingo signs. Honestly, those bingo signs were killing me. I don't know whose idea they were, but that person should be fired immediately. In my opinion, it's really a bad reflection on the Democratic leadership. How can anyone stab you in the back when they're holding up bingo or auction signs? I just...thank you, Simone.

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I support Donald Trump and will not tolerate any disrespect towards him. Keep his name out of your mouth.

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We're not backing down. Trump 2024. The hood's got his back. We're not falling for lockdowns or masks anymore. There's a new virus coming, but we don't care. We're not fooled anymore. It's all about Trump in 2024.

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My TikTok username was 4 doors more horse. There's a picture of me with my AR 15. My profile says "bra, I'm just tryin' to be famous." I wrote that.

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Dick Cheney will be voting for Kamala Harris.

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I don't care who I offend, but if Trump gets convicted of a crime and can still run for president, I'll vote for him. He's funny and I want to see what he does. Trump is hilarious, so I'm voting for him. That's all I have to say.

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I support Trump over Joe Biden. The entire neighborhood is also in favor of Trump. I prefer a president who is not a pedophile. Trump did not receive my vote last time.
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