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Our job as parents is to listen and believe our children when they tell us who they are. This healthcare is life affirming and life saving.

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Talking is definitely a topic that comes up for transgender and gender diverse folks, particularly people who have a feminine or female gender identity and were perhaps assigned male sex at birth. Gender dysphoria is that negative or that uncomfortable distressed feeling that possibly comes with having a gender identity that's different than your sex assigned at birth. So when I think about talking, wanna make sure that people are talking in safe ways. talk to a gender affirming medical provider that's involved in their, child's care or that's involved in your care. I would really recommend that people take breaks from tucking. Pain might feel like an uncomfortable sensation or a tingly sensation, and that's definitely something you'd wanna take a break from and then talk with your medical provider about.

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I offer support to find gender affirming care for youth, even if they need to go out of state. If parents are unsupportive, some kids choose to get emancipated at 16 to make their own medical decisions. Dealing with transphobic parents can be tough, especially if they are very right-leaning. It's important to find a chosen family of friends who accept you. I can send you a binder discreetly if needed.

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Children can begin to understand differences in gender at a young age. Some figure out their gender identity early on, which may not align with their assigned sex at birth. The assumption that a child is definitively male or female based solely on their genitals is incorrect.

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A lot of parents have questions about social transition at a young age. There are no exact guidelines. Again, everybody has their own gender journey and everything feels right or wrong depending on the family. However, many kids do decide to pursue a social transition. Usually that will start with changing their name or their pronouns. They might want to just try dressing a different way or using a different name at home to get used to it and for the family to get used to it. Some people might want to do it on a vacation where they don't really know anyone as a way to try it out. And then slowly over time they might move into using that more with loved ones at school or with friends. However, kids do benefit from social transition over time.

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When a child experiences gender dysphoria, there is a disconnect between their feelings and the gender assigned at birth. This issue is serious, as transgender adolescents have a significantly higher suicide rate—almost eight times that of their cisgender peers. The AAFP's focus on drugs, hormones, and surgical interventions, rather than a more conservative approach like psychotherapy, is concerning. This approach is seen as unethical and inappropriate, highlighting the need for a broader perspective on treatment options.

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Most trans kids know they're trans between ages two and seven, with the speaker's daughter knowing around two and a half. The speaker emphasizes that children know things that adults don't, and these are the things to which adults should listen. The speaker states their child is not mentally ill. To begin gender affirming care, the speaker had to consult with numerous healthcare professionals.

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The speaker's four-year-old child declared, "Mom, you know I'm really a girl. I'm a girl on the inside." This prompted appointments with a psychologist and endocrinologist to rule out medical issues. The child increasingly expressed herself as a girl, wanting to wear dresses and sparkly shoes. Restricting this expression led to depression, and the speaker allowed her to attend school in girl's clothes, which improved her happiness. While the children and teachers were initially accepting, some parents reacted negatively, influenced by "adult bigotry." The family lost friends and family and went into hiding for a year while the daughter grew her hair out. They re-emerged with a happy and confident daughter.

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A child will often know that they are transgender from the moment that they have any ability to express themselves, and parents will often tell us this. We have parents who tell us that their kids, they knew from the minute they were born practically, and actions like refusing to get a haircut or standing to urinate, trying on siblings' clothing, playing with the quote opposite gender toys, things like that. There is more and more a group of adolescents that we are seeing that really are coming to the realization that they might be trans or gender diverse a little bit later on in their life. So what we're seeing from them is that they always sort of knew something was maybe off and didn't have the understanding to know that they might be trans or have a different gender identity than the one they had been assigned. So that is a growing population that we are seeing and that's being recognized as being trans and able to be treated.

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There has been a 5000% increase in adolescents suddenly expressing discomfort with their bodies, which parents report seems to appear "out of the blue." This rapid onset gender dysphoria is often found in kids with conditions like autism, depression, anxiety, trauma, or abuse, and in difficult family situations. This phenomenon tends to happen in clusters, with many kids identifying as transgender or non-binary having friends who also identify that way. This suggests an element of social contagion, where feelings, behaviors, or beliefs spread within a friend group. Some children's social lives are primarily online, where they are influenced to question their identity and assume a new one, sometimes by older individuals.

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Admiral Rachel Levine, a pediatrician and the assistant secretary for the Department of Health and Human Services, addresses concerns about children transitioning before 18. She emphasizes the challenges of adolescence, particularly for those experiencing gender dysphoria. If a child feels female but is undergoing male puberty, it can be distressing. Critics argue that children are too young to make such decisions. Levine clarifies that for prepubertal children, no medical procedures are performed; instead, they are supported through therapy to explore their feelings.

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An endocrinologist questions the use of powerful hormones and surgeries in gender affirmative therapy without concrete evidence of gender identity. They highlight the high rates of desistance in children with gender dysphoria and the lack of objective markers to determine if a child will persist in their gender identity. The Endocrine Society acknowledges the low quality of evidence and the difficulty in identifying which children require treatment. The American Academy of Pediatrics suggests asking the children themselves. The spread of the affirmative model of care has outpaced the evidence supporting it, as shown by systematic reviews indicating poor quality and uncertain benefits. A study on mastectomy in youth is criticized for drawing conclusions based on a small sample size and short follow-up period. The quality of research in this field is questioned.

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The speaker's four-year-old child declared, "Mom, you know I'm really a girl. I'm a girl on the inside." Following this, the child became more insistent about expressing herself as a girl. Medical professionals were consulted to rule out underlying medical issues. The child's insistence on expressing her true gender led to depression when forced to present as a boy. Allowing her to dress as a girl improved her happiness. While the children at school were accepting, some parents were not, leading to the loss of friends and family. The family went into hiding for a year while the child grew her hair out. They re-emerged with a happy and confident daughter.

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Detransition is often portrayed negatively, but research shows that it is not necessarily traumatic with proper support. The Trans Youth Project, a longitudinal study on trans youth, found that retransitioning is not experienced as traumatic when there is a supportive environment. If individuals are allowed to explore their gender identity without judgment, they are generally fine. Most of this exploration happens before any medical interventions are made. Retransition and detransition are about letting people see themselves and supporting them in their journey. If gender nonconformity wasn't stigmatized, detransition would be more accepted. These important considerations about detransition are not widely shared.

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"Sometimes it may be just a phase of development where they're exploring their gender identity and they're kind of getting a sense of who they are, but a lot of children do end up identifying as that gender into young adulthood and adulthood." "The only real way we know for sure that they're going to continue in that gender identity is just to allow them to develop over time." "And so that's what we recommend to parents is to give them the space." "Even if parents are concerned that it's a phase, we never want to tell the child that they shouldn't be expressing their gender identity or that they should be, ashamed for the way that they're expressing their identity because that can be quite harmful." "We just want to give the child a chance to develop and explore on their own."

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Affirmation of gender identity is not a binary concept, similar to health, safety, and welfare. Family courts and judges consider the overall situation, and if both parents accept their child's gender identity, it won't heavily influence the decision. Gender affirmation varies for each person, but family acceptance and social support are crucial. It's important to recognize that people, regardless of age, are constantly evolving and changing. What affirmation means at one stage of growth may differ significantly from another stage.

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I often see youth who have already undergone medical interventions due to a backlog in mental health support. Children may not fully understand the impact of these interventions, making it challenging to discuss. It can be especially difficult for young adolescents starting puberty suppression. We aim to make kids happy in the moment, but it's crucial to consider the long-term effects on their development. This is a growing challenge in our field that requires further exploration.

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If you're transgender or nonbinary and feel uncomfortable with your puberty experiences, you're not alone. Puberty blockers can temporarily halt the changes caused by hormones like testosterone and estrogen, giving you more time to figure out your gender identity. It's okay to not have all the answers right now, as understanding yourself takes time. Talking to a trusted adult, nurse, or doctor can be helpful. To learn more, visit plannedparenthood.org/teens.

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At the age of 2, she insisted that she was a girl, not a boy, despite being called a cute little boy. She struggled with tantrums, which were initially thought to be due to sensory processing disorder. However, when she was 4 and a half, she visited the gender clinic at Lurie Children's Hospital in Chicago. The doctor asked if she was a girl, and she confirmed it. From that moment, everything changed. She became the easiest kid to navigate the world with, put on clothes, and had no more tantrums.

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Using correct names and pronouns is important for adolescents' mental health. Pronouns show understanding and respect. If your child wants to try different pronouns, try your best to use them. Mistakes are okay, just correct yourself and move on. Respecting a child's pronouns leads to better self-esteem and less anxiety and depression in the long run.

The Rich Roll Podcast

WHAT TEENAGERS NEED (And How To Provide It) | Lisa Damour, PhD x Rich Roll Podcast
Guests: Lisa Damour
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The most significant factor for adolescent mental health is strong relationships with caring adults. Today's teenagers face a mental health crisis, with 42% of high school students reporting persistent sadness and 31% of girls experiencing anxiety. This crisis has been exacerbated by the pandemic, which disrupted their social development and independence. Psychologist Lisa Damour discusses the importance of empathy and curiosity when supporting teens. She emphasizes that adolescence, marked by significant neurological changes starting as early as age 11, is inherently stressful for both teens and their parents. Parents often feel confused and out of depth, especially when their previously sweet children become distant and moody. Damour encourages parents to understand that this behavior is part of a natural process of individuation and not a personal affront. Effective parenting during these years involves recognizing the emotional turmoil teens experience and responding with compassion rather than judgment. Damour highlights the need for parents to depersonalize their teens' behavior and to be present for them, even when conversations are tedious or frustrating. She suggests that parents should not seek emotional gratification from their children, as this can lead to misunderstandings and resentment. The conversation also touches on the impact of social media, which can distort norms and exacerbate feelings of inadequacy among teens. Damour notes that while social media can provide connection, it can also lead to harmful comparisons and reinforce negative self-image, particularly among girls. She advocates for delaying access to social media for younger teens and encourages parents to monitor their children's online interactions. Damour stresses the importance of emotional resilience, arguing that distress is a natural part of growth and should not be viewed as a pathology. She believes that allowing teens to experience and navigate their emotions helps them develop the skills necessary for autonomy and resilience. Parents should focus on creating a supportive environment that fosters open communication and emotional expression. In discussing gender identity, Damour emphasizes the importance of affirming a child's self-identification while navigating the complexities of medical interventions. She advises parents to seek expert guidance and to prioritize their child's mental health by being supportive and understanding. Ultimately, Damour encourages parents to listen empathetically to their teens, summarizing their feelings without immediately offering advice. This approach fosters trust and communication, allowing teens to feel heard and understood.

The Megyn Kelly Show

Dr. Lisa Littman on Rapid Onset Gender Dysphoria, the Teen Trans Trend, and Intellectual Rigor
Guests: Dr. Lisa Littman
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In this episode of The Megyn Kelly Show, Dr. Lisa Littman discusses her research on the surge of transgender identification among teenagers, particularly girls, which she terms "rapid onset gender dysphoria." Dr. Littman, a physician and researcher at Brown University, observed a statistically unusual increase in teenagers, especially girls, identifying as transgender and sought to study the phenomenon. Her findings suggest that social and peer influences may play a significant role in these identifications, leading to concerns about a potential social contagion effect. Dr. Littman faced significant backlash from trans activists and some members of the medical community, who accused her of bigotry and conducting shoddy science. Despite this, she received support from many parents who felt their children were being rushed into transitions without adequate evaluation. Her research indicated that many of the teenagers identifying as transgender had pre-existing mental health issues, raising questions about the underlying causes of their gender dysphoria. She emphasizes the importance of thorough evaluations before transitioning, noting that many detransitioners reported feeling pressured by healthcare providers to pursue medical interventions. Dr. Littman highlights the need for a balanced discussion about gender dysphoria, advocating for the inclusion of diverse experiences and cautioning against the oversimplification of the issue. The conversation also touches on the role of social media in shaping perceptions of gender identity among youth, with many parents reporting that their children were influenced by online communities. Dr. Littman calls for a more nuanced understanding of gender dysphoria that considers various factors, including mental health and social dynamics, rather than solely affirming a child's self-identification. She concludes by stressing the need for open dialogue and research to ensure that young people receive appropriate care and support.

The Megyn Kelly Show

More Biden Docs, Crowder vs. Daily Wire, and Gender Identity and Kids, w/ Dave Smith & Dr. Debra Soh
Guests: Dave Smith, Dr. Debra Soh
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Megyn Kelly welcomes comedian Dave Smith and Dr. Debra Soh to discuss various pressing topics, including the recent controversies surrounding President Biden's classified documents and the implications of gender identity discussions. Smith highlights the ongoing investigations into Biden's handling of classified documents, noting public dissatisfaction and potential political ramifications. He draws parallels between Biden's situation and Trump's, criticizing the perceived double standards in legal accountability for political figures. Smith emphasizes the excessive classification of documents in government, suggesting it undermines democratic transparency. The conversation shifts to the cultural climate surrounding gender identity, particularly the challenges parents face when their children express gender dysphoria. Dr. Soh addresses a caller's concerns about her 23-year-old daughter questioning her gender identity. She explains that once children reach adulthood, parents have limited influence, and emphasizes the importance of therapy to rebuild trust and communication. Dr. Soh discusses the phenomenon of rapid onset gender dysphoria, particularly among young women, and stresses the need for supportive environments that encourage open dialogue. Dr. Soh also critiques the current state of therapy, where clinicians may feel pressured to affirm a child's gender identity without exploring underlying issues. She advises parents to seek experienced therapists who are less likely to conform to prevailing ideologies. The discussion then turns to a recent incident involving a transgender woman in a YMCA locker room, where Dr. Soh argues that such situations can endanger women and girls. She asserts that genuine transgender individuals would not typically expose themselves inappropriately, suggesting that those who do may have ulterior motives. The episode concludes with Dr. Soh reiterating the importance of vigilance regarding the safety of children in gender discussions and public spaces, advocating for a balanced approach that respects both individual identities and the rights of others.

The Megyn Kelly Show

Fox's Post-Tucker Crisis, and Harms of Gender "Transition," w/ Chadwick Moore, Miriam Grossman, More
Guests: Chadwick Moore, Miriam Grossman
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Megyn Kelly opens the show discussing upcoming guests, including Niall Gardner on Prince Harry's immigration issues and Dr. Miriam Grossman on her new book about transgender ideology. Chadwick Moore, author and journalist, discusses his biography of Tucker Carlson, which he began writing before Carlson's departure from Fox News. Moore clarifies that while he has communicated with Carlson, the biography is not authorized, as Carlson has not reviewed the content. Moore shares insights into the ongoing legal battle between Carlson and Fox News, highlighting Carlson's recent independent media appearance and Fox's attempts to restrict him through contractual obligations. The conversation touches on the leaking of internal videos of Carlson, with speculation about potential hacking and the involvement of an outside party, Timothy Burke, who is under federal investigation. The discussion shifts to the significant drop in Fox News ratings following Carlson's exit, with Moore suggesting that viewers are abandoning the network due to dissatisfaction with management decisions. Kelly and Moore analyze the implications of Carlson's departure on Fox's future and the changing landscape of media consumption. Later, Kelly introduces Dr. Miriam Grossman, who discusses her book "Lost in Translation," aimed at helping parents navigate the complexities of gender ideology affecting children. Grossman emphasizes the importance of understanding biological sex versus gender identity and warns against the medicalization of gender dysphoria in children. She highlights the rise in children seeking gender transition and the potential long-term consequences of medical interventions, including infertility and loss of sexual function. Grossman stresses the need for parents to educate themselves and their children about these issues, advocating for a cautious approach to gender identity discussions. She shares personal anecdotes from her practice, illustrating the emotional turmoil families face when navigating these challenges. The conversation concludes with a call for awareness and proactive education to prevent crises related to gender identity in children.

Modern Wisdom

The Collapse Of The UK’s Gender Identity Clinic - Hannah Barnes
Guests: Hannah Barnes
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The leadership of GIDS and the Tavistock Trust is held accountable for not adequately addressing clinical and safeguarding concerns raised by staff regarding the care of young people. Hannah Barnes, during her research for her book, felt anxious about the reception of her findings but was pleasantly surprised by the overwhelmingly positive response across the political spectrum. The book emphasizes that the focus should be on the quality of care provided to young people rather than ideological battles. GIDS began in 1989, initially offering talking therapies to help children explore their gender identity. Over time, pressure grew to provide puberty blockers to younger individuals, particularly after the Dutch clinic reported positive outcomes. However, concerns about the long-term effects of these treatments, especially on bone density and psychological development, persisted. By 2015, referrals surged, with a notable demographic shift as more girls sought help, often with complex mental health issues. Barnes highlights that the evidence base for using puberty blockers was limited, and many young people referred did not fit the criteria established by earlier studies. Clinicians expressed worries about the implications of early medical interventions, particularly regarding the potential to lock in a gender identity that might change. The narrative around the necessity of these treatments shifted over time, often without sufficient data to support such claims. The systemic failures within GIDS, including inadequate oversight and the influence of advocacy groups, contributed to a lack of proper care and decision-making. The NHS plans to replace GIDS with regional services focusing on holistic mental health support and rigorous data collection to better understand the needs of young people.
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