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Where are all the Trump supporters? You won, so you can come out now. Do you expect us to act out like you do, by burning buildings and looting? We don’t need to hide anymore. You could have been open about your support all along. We’ve always shown our support openly with signs and flags, but you often find ways to take them down. Instead of worrying about us, focus on your own mental health, which seems to be declining. We’re still celebrating our win with friends and family.

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Congratulations on your election win. You’ll be leading a deeply divided country for the next four years. Will you concede the 2020 election to help unify the nation? No, I won't concede. The country is divided, but Joe Biden is the president, not me. He has been a divider, particularly through the weaponization of the justice department against his political opponents. This aggressive approach backfired on him and has further divided the country.

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I want a president who is capable of doing the job, and there are many capable people in this country. Raise your right hand and repeat after me: Donald Trump is not going to be president of the United States. Take it to the bank. I, Donald John Trump, do solemnly swear that Donald Trump will never be elected president of the United States, that I will faithfully execute the office of president of the United States. I continue to believe Mr. Trump will not be president and will, to the best of my ability, preserve, protect, and defend the Constitution of the United States. So help me God. Donald Trump is not going to be president of the United States. Donald Trump has been elected president, defeating Vice President Kamala Harris and making a political comeback unlike any in modern American politics. Congratulations, Mr. Khan, the 45th and 47th President of the United States of America, Donald J. Trump.

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I did great at the debate the other night. The other guy is quitting, so we have Kamala now. She's better. Imagine him dealing with Putin and the Chinese president. He's probably quitting. Keep knocking them out. Thank you.

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I'm tired of holding back and keeping it clean. What's happening with President Trump is bullshit. Fuck these Democrats. Their actions are disgraceful and disrespectful to our country. They keep indicting him for no reason. All he did was prioritize our nation and expose the truth about these criminals. Their behavior shows guilt. President Trump doesn't deserve this treatment. Hillary Clinton and others deserve it instead. We don't care about these indictments. We will still vote for him, even if he's in jail. He can make this country great again. Leave my president, Donald J. Trump, alone.

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I will miss seeing President Trump leave the arena, but this isn't the end of the story. It's just the end of one chapter and the beginning of another. Today, we go out and vote, encouraging our friends to do the same. Our goal is to put President Trump back in office, along with a supportive Senate and House. Everyone, make sure to get to the polls tomorrow, make phone calls, and help your friends vote. We can make this happen.

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I've had enough of the outrageous things coming from that orange guy's mouth. From threats about Canada to ridiculous claims about the Gulf of Mexico and Greenland, it's insane. Do you not realize the damage you're causing? This is getting out of hand, and it's every day with his nonsense. I hope when the consequences hit, you really feel it. I’m enjoying these meltdowns, though. Keep them coming! Trump isn’t going anywhere; he’s going to make this country great again and bring peace. You call us crazy, but have you listened to yourself? You wish us the worst, but we’re about to thrive in this new era. So, take a break and rest up; it’s going to be a long four years.

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Congratulations to the DNC on losing another election to Donald Trump. You replaced me with a candidate who has no likability. They said I was too old and a joke, but here's a joke: What do Willie Brown and the 2024 election have in common? Kamala Harris blew both of them. Seriously, Hillary lost to Trump, and now Kamala has too. This man has beaten more women than Doug Emhoff. Congrats on losing to Hitler again; I hope he locks you all up this time. Dank Brandon out.

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Congratulations to the DNC on losing another election to Donald Trump. You replaced me with a candidate who has little appeal. They claimed I was too old and slow, but here's a joke: What do Willie Brown and the 2024 election have in common? Kamala Harris blew both of them. Hillary lost to Trump, and now Kamala follows suit. It seems Trump has a pattern of defeating women in elections. Anyway, congrats on losing to him again. I hope he locks you all up this time. Dank Brandon out.

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I'm feeling pretty good this morning knowing Trump is now president. It's amusing to see how scared some people are, like Sadiq Khan and Lammy, who have criticized him. Starmer, who sent labor reps to oppose Trump, has burned some bridges. Many celebrities who supported Harris are likely nowhere to be found now. For those upset about Trump's win, tough luck—it's about time we had some good news. This will definitely impact the UK, and I hope Trump works to end the Russia-Ukraine war, stopping the massive financial aid from the UK. Let's also hope he closes the borders, setting a precedent for others. Whether people like it or not, this is what we needed. If anyone on the left wants to leave, don't let the door hit you on the way out.

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Bobby, it's your favorite president here. I forgive you for being a loser about the election results. It's not your fault you have a low IQ. Believe me, I won, and Kamala lost big time. You were wrong. You're a total loser, and your show sucks. You're going to get low ratings. It's a disgrace to go from raging gold to raging nobody. It's a horror. Kamala's probably getting drunk somewhere, the f***ing virgin. Can you believe this guy calling your favorite president a virgin? Look at that crowd; it's a disgrace. But don't worry, we already won big. Come here, paparazzi! I love this guy. Do you want to do a little dance?

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Wait, that's it? This is weird and creepy. No way! He's happy Trump won and having a great time. Look at that smile! Joe, where did your 20 million votes go? Can someone ask that? Hey, liberals and press, can you find out?

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On Tuesday, Americans elected Donald Trump as president again, surprising many. This is the same Trump who sought vengeance against his opponents. With the Supreme Court's support, there are no protections for those who oppose him. At SNL, we proudly declare our unwavering support for Trump, seeing ourselves in him and wanting future generations to look up to him. We jokingly mention our votes and even introduce a new impression, Hot Jack Trump, celebrating his potential presidency. We express excitement for Trump 2.0 and humorously reflect on the past, wishing for another January 6th. We also mention Elon Musk as a backup plan if things go wrong. Finally, we encourage young men who supported Trump and Musk, reminding them to rise and embrace their potential.

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Donald Trump is going to win, and that's amazing. The speaker is thrilled by what they've watched over the past 9 years. This is the end of a redemption arc. The speaker has never seen anybody treated like Donald Trump was treated ever. They attacked him, defamed him, indicted him, arrested him, and let him get shot in the face. And he's going to win anyway. Donald Trump's victory will be a triumph of the human spirit. It will be a triumph of Americans over the machine that seeks to oppress them. It'll be a middle finger wagging in the face of the worst people in the English speaking world who are leaders. It will be a moral victory the size of which the speaker never thought they would live to see.

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Hey, everyone! I'm at Trump Tower tonight with my patriot friends after listening to President Trump's magnificent speech. But let me tell you, the Democrats really showed their asses tonight. I don't know what's wrong with them but it's incredibly embarrassing. Other countries must be mortified looking at us right now. If you don't like President Trump, fine, but don't embarrass the entire country! What the cane-walking guy did was horrible and I'm glad they escorted him out. I don't know what's wrong with the Democrats, they're dumb. They won't exist in the future after this stunt. We love you, President Trump. We got your back. Don't worry about those stupid Democrats; they've got mental issues and they're just jealous we voted for you!

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On Tuesday, Donald Trump was elected president again, surprising many. This is the same Trump who attempted to overturn the last election and called for vengeance against his opponents. With no protections in place, those who oppose him are at risk. SNL expresses unwavering support for Trump, claiming they see themselves in him and admire his controversial honesty. They humorously declare their loyalty, joking about voting for him multiple times and introducing a new impression, "Hot Jacked Trump." The cast expresses excitement for Trump's presidency, with lighthearted remarks about the future and a nod to Elon Musk. They encourage young men to rise up and embrace their potential, closing with a rallying call for support.

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Donald Trump will be the forty-seventh president of the United States, causing Joe Biden to ask who was number 46. The election sent shockwaves across democratic strongholds. Bill Clinton is distraught. Hunter Biden was shocked. Jimmy Carter said, You kept me alive for this. Jerry Nadler will no longer be giving a courtesy flush. Doug Amoff is hitting on the ugly nannies. Ilhan Omar told her brother, not tonight. The View threw a shoe. Nancy Pelosi's eyebrows moved to Canada. Randy Weingarten has yet to come out of her toadstool. Admiral Rachel Levine is taking a leave of absence to spend more time with her testicles. Hillary Clinton considered killing herself. Taylor Swift cried all night. Mark Cuban paused his transition into Rachel Maddow. James Carville could barely unhinge his jaw to eat his morning mouse. Barack Obama vowed to move back to Kenya. Michelle changed her name back to Mike.

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I was relieved when I heard Trump was shot, but then disappointed to learn it was just in the ear. I don't feel bad about it. He disgusts me.

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Bobby, it's your favorite president here. I forgive you for being a loser about the election; it's not your fault you have a low IQ. Believe me, I won, Kamala lost big time. You're wrong, and you're a total loser. Your show sucks and will get low ratings. You've gone from raging bull to nobody, a disgrace. It's a horror. Kamala's probably drunk somewhere. Can you believe that guy called me the president of Virgin? Look at that crowd. It's a disgrace, but we won big, okay? Come here, paparazzi! I love this guy. Want to do a little dance? Come here.

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Donald Trump is now the 47th president of the United States, and it's time to celebrate! We've been waiting for this moment for four years. Let's get up, dance, and enjoy this historic occasion. Despite challenges over the past years, we are ready for a new beginning. Americans have felt forgotten, but now we can look forward to being prioritized again. This is a new era, and I’m excited about what Trump will do for our country. Thank you, Donald Trump, for fighting for the American people. God bless you and God bless America! Let's do this!

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We won an election that everyone said couldn't be won. We beat Hillary Clinton. I used to call her Crooked Hillary, but I took that name away from her. That was a great day about 2 months ago. I don't like using names on people, so now I call her Beautiful Hillary. She's a beautiful woman.

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I believe this may have been the most effective speech. If there was any doubt that Donald Trump is the political colossus of our time, this night and speech should put that to rest. The Democrats seem to be falling into trap after trap. He recognized and celebrated people, pointing to them in the gallery and sharing their stories, while the Democrats sat glumly. It was a terrible look for them, and Al Green's attempt to disrupt the speech was also a bad look. Politically speaking, this was powerful stuff, as powerful as I can recall hearing.

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Congratulations to the DNC on losing another election to Donald Trump. You replaced me with a candidate who lacks appeal. They claimed I was too old and slow, but here's a joke: what do Willie Brown and the 2024 election have in common? Kamala Harris moved both of them. Hillary lost to Trump, and now it’s Kamala's turn. This man has beaten more women than Doug Emhoff. Anyway, congrats on losing to Trump again. I hope he locks you all up this time.

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I'm embarrassed that the US presidential election wasn't conducted properly. We had more dead voters than soldiers buried in historic battlefields. The election on November 3rd was not free, fair, or transparent. Everyone knows that Donald Trump won.

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I'm smiling because you, deep state, failed to lock me away for 20 years. I'm a free man, blessed and joyful, liberated from your control. How does it feel to fail against the Make America Great Again patriots? Retreat and never show your face in America again. The deep state should be afraid because the January 6th patriots are coming for you.
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