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I was asked about Trump becoming speaker and I answered honestly. I think "speaker Trump" sounds great.

Have you ever allowed someone to take your power away? Remember, you still possess the same power and purpose you had before November 5th.

Have you said thank you at all during this entire meeting today? You went to Pennsylvania and campaigned for the opposition in October. Can you offer some appreciation for the United States of America and the president who is trying to save your country?

Did you coach a parent on how their biological son could spend the night in hotel rooms with girls during field trips? No, that did not happen.

Speaker 0: Michael and I are not easily scared, except when Michelle is angry. Speaker 1: They fooled the country and the world. Speaker 0: They had us all fooled. Speaker 1: Will we see the first gay or woman president? Let's not jump to conclusions. Speaker 0: Michelle is a transgender. We all know.

Did you automatically do it? Did you push right there? Yes, I pushed right there.

I believe the Trump shooting was staged. I found it funny and thought the assassin must have been paid to miss. I wish they had succeeded. It's legal to wish harm on a candidate, not a president. Love loopholes!

If that hit had landed the first time, I would have lifted you up. Are you serious?

Did you push it there? Yes, I pushed it there.

I was relieved when I heard Trump was shot, but then disappointed to learn it was just in the ear. I don't feel bad about it. He disgusts me.

We need Trump here because the Secret Service doesn't mess around.

You missed a shot at Donald Trump, which could make him a martyr and hand him the presidency of the United States.

If Trump is convicted, would you still support him as your party's choice? Raise your hand if you would.

If all Latinos are removed from the country, who will clean your toilets, Donald Trump? That's a big no. You know what I mean?

- The speaker suggests that becoming an astronaut is possible by studying flying or science, implying you could someday be the first astronaut to walk on the moon, but then challenges that claim by saying there already was an astronaut who first walked on the moon, stating “Well, no. Not really. That wasn't real.” - The speaker asserts that during the Cold War, in order to beat the Russians, the moon landing was faked, claiming that “That never happened.” - The speaker draws attention to a wreckage image, asking, “See how there's no windows on the side and see underneath where there's like a pod thing? What's that?” - The speaker describes a wreckage observation: “Take a look at this wreckage. See how there's no plane parts on the ground there? What does that look like? A metho.” - The speaker asserts that President Bush was in a secret Yale society called the Skull and Bones, and that his dad was in it too, and that they all worshiped Satan. - The speaker asks, “President Bush worshiped Satan?” and answers, “In my personal opinion, absolutely.”

Didn't think we'd push back? Newsflash: he's coming back. Time to ground that pow. Hey. Not it today. Not at all.

I'm prepared for the great cleansing, to genocide conservatives in this country. Will you be out on the streets with your clock? Maybe, I need to go back to Nebraska and get it.

Wanna see something interesting? Look at what happened. I don't know. He might be a bit off; I think they hit him because of that. What do you think?

Did he just call for the genocide of everyone who supports the Palestinian people?

"Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Oh, please don't hurt me." "Oh my Right? You little Shoot it off. You little die."

I think we should remove the homicide from the White House for a fresh start, we don't want any more murderers. Next question. Who are the murderers? Oh, Clinton, he murdered a guy. We're not making accusations without proof. That's too far, let's move on. This is not my week. Do you know where you heard that? We don't need this. I don't want to hear it, this isn't the place for accusations, and you're supposed to be funny. This is a live show. I thought it was a matter of record. You won't be invited back if you don't shut up. Let's talk football. Manslaughter! Let's talk football.

Mister Hegseth, are you attracted to obese Hawaiian women with low intelligence? No, senator. Are you aware that I used the potty by myself today? No, senator. You seem quite fertile; if confirmed, would you commit to having a baby with me? No, senator. Are you saying under oath that you refuse to impregnate a portly Hawaiian woman, even if she can use the potty independently?

If you had to choose to be stuck in an elevator with either President Trump, Mike Pence, or Jeff Sessions, who would it be? Would one of us have to come out alive?

Senator Brown, will you apologize to the people of Ohio for impeaching President Trump?

When I'm president, I'll send reinforcements to Texas instead of a restraining order.