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I am literally telling you that they're murdering these people, and nobody will listen to me. These people aren't dying from COVID. They don't care what is happening to these people. They don't. I'm literally coming here every day and watching them kill them.
It's like going in the fucking twilight zone. Like, everyone here is okay with this. The only way I can kind of put this into context for everybody is an extreme example: He's like, if we were in Nazi Germany and they were taking the Jews to go put them in a gas chamber, I'm the one like, they're saying, hey. This is not good. This is bad. We should not be doing this. And then everyone tells me, hang in there. You're doing a great job. You can't save everybody.
But these people aren't dying from COVID. Let me give you several examples here. An anesthesiologist intubated the patient’s right bronchus and of a patient, and they couldn't get the stats up. For about five hours, we were waiting on a chest x-ray to confirm that the placement was wrong. In the meantime, while we're waiting for that, and we've told the anesthesiologist that it was placed wrong because, like, literally only one side of his fucking chest is inflating, he dies.
A patient had a heart rate of 40, and the resident starts doing chest compressions on him, which is not what you do. You just externally pace them or you give him some atropine. Then I run in there to stop him from doing chest compressions on somebody with the fucking pulse. And then he decides to push epi. He throws some pads on him to defibrillate the guy in bradycardia. Okay? He has a heart rate of 40 and a stable, you know, bradycardic rhythm. We just need to give him, like, somatropine and pace him. He fucking defibrillates him and kills him. I ran out of the patient’s room to get the director of nursing who was standing out there. And I’m like, can you stop him? He’s going to kill that patient. He’s going to kill that patient if he defibrillates him with bradycardia and a heart rate of 40. The director of nursing just shook his head, and I turned around, and he killed the dude.
There was a nurse who placed an NG tube into some guy’s lungs and filled his lungs with tube feeding. There was a nurse who confused a long-acting insulin with a short-acting insulin and gave thirty units of a fast-acting insulin and killed the guy. It’s just here they’re just gonna let them rot on the vent. They’re medically mismanaging these patients.
And, like, I’m not a doctor, but there’s basic standards of care. When somebody’s low on blood, literally on the brink of a critical low blood level, we should replace the blood. I asked the residents, and they’re like, does he have internal bleeding? And I said, no. Then they’re like, well, we’re not replacing the blood. In these COVID patients, they all eventually need a blood transfusion. Their blood—if you don’t have enough blood to oxygenate your body, the vent settings don’t fucking matter because you have no oxygen carrying capacity of your blood.
We have a nurse who fell asleep at the nurses’ station while we were all in rooms, and her norepinephrine ran out. And the guy had no fucking blood pressure and didn’t perfuse his brain, and I’m pretty sure his brain dead. That same nurse is now running a CRRT machine, a dialysis-like machine, that she has never done before. She said she’ll figure it out. I’m pretty fucking smart, and I figure a lot of shit out, but I would never attempt to try and figure out a CRRT machine on the fly.
We are adequately staffed. There’s a shit ton of staff in there, like, and we have a nurse who does CRRT in there. She has a different patient load. We told them, swap these nurses so the one that knows how to work this machine can work this machine, but they didn’t wanna do that. So I’m pretty sure that patient will be dead here in a couple hours. Nobody is listening. They don’t care what is happening to these people. They don’t. I’m literally coming here every day and watching them kill them.
I mean, we’re not gonna save everybody. That’s fine. Like, come on, guys. We’re not God. Some of these people are just on sedation to keep them on the vents. Nothing else. I have a lady on a tracheostomy on a vent, and she’s not even fucking cognizant. She’s not even on sedation. You know what we give her every day? I give her breathing treatments, albuterol, and she gets insulin. And that’s it. We’re not treating the COVID, guys. For real, we’re not treating the COVID. You know, every day, we try and get these guys off the vents. Right?
Because there’s criteria for weaning. Every day, the day shift nurse will wean them down to minimum sedation. Every night, we come in and we get the same two residents and they fucking max out all the sedation again and undo all the work from the day shift. Then the day shift attending will come in, and they’ll all do rounds. And they’ll be like, he wasn’t synchronizing with the vent. So we had to turn all the sedation on. And I’m like, he wasn’t synchronizing with the vent because it’s in the wrong vent mode. I even tried getting a hold of Black advocacy groups here. They just put me on hold or hang up on me. Tried talking to management. Now I got new units. And someone come up with some type of a solution for me because I’m kind of out of ideas. You know, I try and talk with some of the other nurses here, and they’re like, well, you can’t save everybody. And they all know what’s happening. They all agree with me and they all just shake their heads and I’m like, am I the only one who is not a sociopath to think that this is okay?
I mean, guys, they literally don’t even know when they’re dead. Like, how many times have I told you they’ve assigned me a dead person? Like, how long have they been dead? Nobody knows. Like, how is anybody assessing anything without a stethoscope? Normally, we have disposable stethoscopes, but I brought my old chunky one. Nobody has listened to anybody’s lungs as long as I’ve been here. Even with disposable stethoscopes. I keep telling them that, you know, the guys are like, my patient’s going acidosis. We need to do something about this before his kidneys shut down. Then they run five liters of bicarb into a person who’s gained 20 pounds of water weight and completely throw him into heart failure, and he dies several hours later.
That was one of my patients. So I let them know. They had me start the bicarb before I left one night. And by the time I came back the next shift, he was dead. And they assigned him to me, and he was already in a body bag. Like, guys, they’re not dying of COVID. I am literally telling you that they’re murdering these people, and nobody will listen to me. My lead at the other hospital warned me I’d have a problem and advocate for the patients too. They moved him to a completely different hospital. I tried reaching out, but he hasn’t texted me. I’m going to the unit. Let’s see how they kill him there. Okay? Stay safe. Stay out of NYC for your health care.