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On a Saturday night at the chip shop, someone is about to win the lotto. Could it be Moe, who loves chip butties? Or the guy who only eats scampi in even numbers? Maybe Adele, who wonders who buys pickled eggs? It turns out to be Deborah, who becomes a millionaire dancing in the chip shop. Lotto creates 2 millionaires weekly. Will you be next? Translation: On a Saturday night at the chip shop, someone is about to win the lottery. It could be Moe, who loves chip butties, or the guy who only eats scampi in even numbers. Maybe Adele, who wonders who buys pickled eggs. It turns out to be Deborah, who becomes a millionaire dancing in the chip shop. The lottery creates 2 millionaires weekly. Will you be next?

I need gas and grand master. You crying more? Maybe go back down to the shop and get you a wham burger or some french fries. How about a wine.

Speaker: Just finished the resort season in Crimea and came to the capital! So, tell us, how is life in Crimea now? Can you hear me? Answer, how is life in Crimea now? Forget about the water! Can I have some water? Yes, here is a glass. No need for a glass, just wash my head. Oh, it feels so good to swim now. Oh, nice.

Speaker 0 asks Speaker 1 about buying tanks, but they turn out to be broken. Speaker 1 admits to selling broken tanks for home decor. Speaker 0 questions the purpose of buying broken tanks and eventually learns that Putin took them. Speaker 1 acknowledges the foolishness of selling broken tanks and Speaker 0 decides to buy them back. Translation: Speaker 0 asks Speaker 1 about buying tanks, but they turn out to be broken. Speaker 1 admits to selling broken tanks for home decor. Speaker 0 questions the purpose of buying broken tanks and eventually learns that Putin took them. Speaker 1 acknowledges the foolishness of selling broken tanks and Speaker 0 decides to buy them back.

Hey, do you feel something small? Where's your machine gun? They said you'd get it in battle. Listen, what about Moskoviev, are you going to take him down? **Translation:** Hey, do you feel something small? Where's your machine gun? They said you'd get it in battle. Listen, what about Moskoviev, are you going to take him down?

How many are there? One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. Where are you headed? I wanted to ask you. Which regions are you from? Kherson. Transcarpathia. Did you get in okay, is the food

Спикер 0 выражает сомнение и просит разрешения посмотреть: «Я не могу так дай посмотреть». Он указывает на предмет и произносит: «Вот оно. Вперёд, не сись там» и сообщает вес: «10 килограммов». Затем добавляет фрагменты: «Половину, я живите». В завершение поясняет действие: «Я когда положил, я ложу сюда.» Speaker 0 expresses doubt and asks for permission to look: «Я не могу так дай посмотреть». He points to the object and says: «Вот оно. Вперёд, не сись там» and notes the weight: «10 килограммов». Then adds fragments: «Половину, я живите». Finally he explains the action: «Я когда положил, я ложу сюда.»

Відписати нам платить. А що на секрет? Що ви ж брати? Я сподіваюсь, що коли я буду у східучі звернення дивитися, так побачення. Translation: Unsubscribing pays us. What's the secret? What are you taking? I hope that when I look at outgoing requests, it will be like a date.

Hello, Shawn! How are you? I'm great, thanks! I appreciate you introducing me to Twitter; it's been a lot of fun connecting with people. So, tell me about your birthday party—am I invited? Yes, you're definitely invited! It’ll start around 9:30 PM and go until about 3 AM. I hear your twins are almost 3 years old—are they spoiled? Absolutely! I just want to give them everything. Do you do housework at home? Sometimes, but I have a habit of dropping things on the floor. Your vodka line is doing well, right? Yes, Ciroc vodka sales are up significantly, and we have new flavors for the holidays, like coconut and red berry. Remember to drink responsibly!

I am Russian! And you? Well, let me think! Okay. I'm with Ukraine. Honestly, Ukraine has always betrayed Russia. You can't understand them there. Ukraine with Russia! Then Russia! Ukraine! Let's go! Oh! Translation: I am Russian! And you? Well, let me think! Okay. I'm with Ukraine. Honestly, Ukraine has always betrayed Russia. You can't understand them there. Ukraine with Russia! Then Russia! Ukraine! Let's go! Oh!

I'm looking for the money. Zelensky, where's the money? NATO says you're good for it. So again, where's the money, Zelensky? I need to know, where's the money? Also, where's the fucking money she had?

Я целюсь в людей, но автомат холостой. Отойдите от машины! Люди лежат на полу, показываю. Еще одного несут. Оля, не сюда! Кто знает, что происходит? Они там варят. Еще один есть! --- I'm aiming at people, but the gun is empty. Step away from the car! People are lying on the floor, I'm showing it. Another one is being carried. Olya, not this way! Who knows what's happening? They're cooking over there. There's another one!

В аэропорту дали? Да. На сколько времени? Трудовой или туристическая? Translation: Were you given at the airport? Yes. For how long? Work or tourist?

Пушина здоровья это очень. Это вот тебе арбузы. Кстати, у нас природа не позволяет их возделывать. Но мы попробовали. Готов, готов. Pushina health is very. Here are watermelons for you. By the way, nature does not allow us to cultivate them. But we tried. Ready, ready.

Hey, do you feel that? Where's your gun? They said you lost it in battle. Are you going to take out Moskoviev?

Can you spank me really hard? No, wait, with my underwear on! You've been a bad boy, so I have to spank you. Vitali, come here! Oh, wow! We're flying! Congratulations, you wanted Vitali, and I'm here. How are you? David, your grand wife! We have a game show right now, a five-level game show. Where are you going? I'm leaving. You're leaving? The cops are outside.

Лена, что ты нашла после русского? Максимка пробил охладитель, но все нормально, мы проверим позже. Давай закончим видео. Translation: Lena, what did you find after the Russian? Maximka punctured the cooler, but everything is fine, we'll check later. Let's finish the video.

Дайте два автомата! Быстрее! Лежи и открой рот! Ушла? На телефон! Куда? Куда? Лежать! По одному! Куда бежать? Один мой! Снимай меня на камеру! --- Give me two guns! Faster! Lie down and open your mouth! Did she leave? On the phone! Where? Where? Lie down! One at a time! Where to run? Mine! Film me on camera!

Я поранена! Я не знаю, що сталося. Прилетіло щось. Ти не марна риба. Був сильний. Алькайна, ти в порядку? Так, все добре. Вставай, ти гарно. Алькай, я прийняла. Дивись, як я пускаюся один. Що потрібно? Тримай, хай то сюди. Окей? Водичку, як потрібно? І що, дати? --- I'm hurt! I don't know what happened. Something flew in. You're not worthless. It was strong. Alka, are you okay? Yes, I'm fine. Get up, you're doing well. Alka, I accepted it. Look how I'm going down alone. What do you need? Hold this, bring it here. Okay? Water, if you want? What should I give?

Can I have a light? Sure, here you go. And your wallet. Give him your wallet, Nick. Why? He has a knife. That's not a knife, that's a knife. Translation (if needed): Can I have a light? Sure, here you go. And your wallet. Give him your wallet, Nick. Why? He has a knife. That's not a knife, that's a knife.

I want a sarsaparilla. What is that?

Українцям побажаємо в цей час! Одна допомога в кожному будинку, бажаємо миру в кожній сім'ї. Ті, хто підтримує Росію, зустрінуть опір на кожному кроці. Москва - п'ятий зірковий яшапон. Translation: We wish Ukrainians well during this time! One aid package in every home, wishing peace for every family. Those who support Russia will face resistance at every turn. Moscow is the fifth star yashapon.

«Я лечу в район посреди разных кацабских штук Бляхай, кайфую.» «А вот это ж да, вот тут где-то лепка должна быть толще.» «Ну вот еще.» «Вот она разворачивается, еще, еще, еще стоп.» «И вот тут немного левее на 11 он сюда сейчас.» «Вот тут?» «В этом разделе.» «Ну ахуенно. Вкусил поле, что все сейчас ли завислись.» «Немного правее Вот тут направо, вот сюда заезжалось Вот прям сюда заезжалось Ой-ёй-ёй-ёй» I'm flying to an area amid various katsab things, Blyakhai, enjoying it. And this, yes, here the embossing should be thicker. Well, more. There it turns, more, more, stop. Here, a bit left, about 11 units, he comes here now. Here? In this section. Well, awesome. Tasted the field; it seems everyone has paused. A bit to the right. Here turn right, drive onto it. Oh dear.

Here are my glasses. Instead of a fan, there's a printed box attached here. Let's take it apart and show you what's inside. English Translation: (The original text is in Russian. The above is already in English.)

Recently, Vladimir Putin received a letter saying: "Rewrite your million population 9 times and you will be happy."