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Their house looks good. I love podcasts. Oh, I'm so sorry! I wasn't looking. Gravity's Rainbow is my favorite book. I'm Charlie. I'm Ben. Would you ever watch where you're going? You charged into me like a rhino! It's November; shouldn't you be with the Halloween decorations? What are you listening to? A podcast on how to be less of a coward? You have something in your hair—oh, it's a rat. I thought I was unlucky in love. Hi, I had to draw you; I call it "getting hit by a garbage truck." Most lesbians are fans. You can say my music sucks. At least you know who I am. We're on SNL! You're like 6'7" with the confidence of a 52-year-old. We're way more brat than you—brat stands for being really awesome together. Good day!

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Speaker: Hello? Oh my goodness. Take off your pants. Can you not touch it? No, don't touch it.

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I'm a man. I'm man enough to cry during "The Notebook" and sing show tunes in the shower, even the girl parts. I'm man enough to sit down to pee and write Twilight fan fiction. I can hug another guy without it being weird and compliment a dude at the gym, even giving him a little kiss on the head. I'm man enough to vote for Kamala Harris. Are you man enough?

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Get a rainbow! I'm like a guy. Angry Michael, I’ll call the cops. You won’t do anything. I just stepped on your jacket, Michael. What’s up with that? It’s crazy. What do you think of Michael Jackson, people? You look alike!

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Hey, do you mind if I sit here? I'm Bug. What's your name? Sarah? Okay. Do you listen to Cavetown or watch Dream? No? What do you do? You do makeup? That's cool, me too. I could put some blush on you. Oh, you're already wearing blush. Not enough, though. It's been nice sitting with you. Maybe you can sit with me at lunch. Before you go, what are your pronouns? She/her? Okay. Well, I'm he/him/ze/air/air/bark/frogself/and fan. Catch you on the flips, Era.

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I got kicked out of my boyfriend's house. Really? You too? Did it help you? No, I'm fine. I don't know why you told me that. Don't leave me now; come on.

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Oh my gosh. Whose baby is that? Excuse me? It's ours. Okay. I'm sorry, but gay gay people can't have a baby? Yeah. But, like, where did it come from? We didn't pull it out of your vagina, if that's what you're asking. People think they can ask gay people anything. It's not okay. I loaned you $10,000. I think we're just wondering who the mother is. Well, between the two of us, I'm more emotional and I like shopping, so me, I think. Yeah. But I mean, I have long hair and he is an alcoholic. So I guess it's like two moms, I guess. What do you want us to say? That we stole her? Did you? Well, we like to think of it as she stole us. English is my eighth language and even I know what that expression means.

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I'm smiling at you, do you have phlegm? Join in, kids. This is my college roommate from T Lakehead. We're Lakers. We're wearing...

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I go left, I go right. I go right. I go right. I go right. I go right. I go right. I go right. I go right. I go right. I go right. I go right. Up and another belt. That was also a real person, who was also working on another problem related to gender issues. And we just made the craziest decision about a boy, that's what I'm dealing with. Only needs to be done with one.

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I was just trying to have a conversation, but you got so emotional. I wore this hat because it's cold; it's from Cabela's. It's just a hunting hat with a US flag design, geese, and elk, like an Oregonian thing. I didn't mean to make a political statement. We then started talking about Elon Musk for some reason, and I mentioned he should be president in 2028, but you think he has no skills and cheats. Why are you so upset? I'm just a human being. I don't think less of you even if we disagree. I'm sorry if I disrespected you, and I didn't mean to point my finger.

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Where are you? Are you okay? Oh my god, my wig is coming off!

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Guys. You're gonna be reading this. You will. They're be reading this. This. That's cool.

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You're really covered up, man. Do you need water?

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I'm a man. Are you a sir or ma'am? I assume you're a man.

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Pretty close. How are you doing? Oh, just shut up. You're all dressed up today. Thank you very much.

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Let's try it on. We need to pray first. Even though it's hot, we still have to pray to ensure it fits. Are you okay? I'm fine. I want to get a smoke.

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Today is gender reassignment day. I’m assigning new genders and pronouns. Jimmy, you’re now she/her. Carlos, you’re Carla, she/they. Rebecca, those shoes are non-binary. Jack, you’re now Jackie, she/her. Everyone at this table is non-binary. Sam, you’re non-binary Sam. Chad, you remain a Chad. Are you all happy with your genders? No? Too bad! For homework, if you’re a guy, listen to Nickelback and Joe Rogan. If you’re a woman, just keep being a woman. Non-binary folks, I expect colored hair by Monday. Thank you!

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I love your jacket! Thank you! I love yours too!

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Excuse me, who does your makeup? Would you consider playing us? We are four of the Ultras. We're at a pretty high level. Are you sure you want to play us? Okay, that was fun. Playing for those Ultras is really hard. You know we're professional athletes, right? What sport do you play? I smell Ultra. Want to play for an Ultra?

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Sarah: I live in the borough next to Hillenden. Since I moved into my house in 2019, my local shop has had three stabbings, one murder. My friend was murdered last year on the High Street. A girl I know was murdered in Southall Park. The government are failing us. I’m scared for my children; I have a 22-year-old son, and I’m begging him to move out of the country. Julia: Oh my goodness. Sarah: What are these politicians doing to us? They’re putting our children in so much danger. They’re putting everyone in danger, and they’re not doing anything to help us. Julia: And that’s the thing a lot of us feel. How many is too many? Sarah: They’re pushing us to do something we don’t want to do. We are peaceful people. British people never vote against their government. They’re going to push us through it because they’re not listening to us. Our friend, our family are dying. I had a cousin murdered twenty years ago. He was stabbed to death and nothing has changed, Julia. Julia: I’m so sorry, Sarah. I’m sure I speak for everyone listening and watching right now. My heart goes out to you. Sarah: I don’t leave the house without a man. Julia: You’re that worried? Sarah: Everyone I know is getting stabbed. Julia: I’m trying. Sarah: They’re getting raped in parts. This is where I live, not where the politicians live. Julia: Do you think that’s part of the issue that they don’t live in the real world? Sarah: Kissama, if you’re listening to this, please do something. I’m petrified. I’ve never broken the law in my life. I’ve been a law-abiding citizen. I’ve been a civil servant. Please do something. It’s us that are dying on the street. You should talk about being racist. We’re not racist. My sister’s mixed race. I was a white child brought up in a mixed-race family. Nothing to do with race. Exactly. She live with our safety. Julia: Sarah, I mean, 100%. Sarah: We Julia: we agree with you every single word, and I’m so sorry. I’m sending you a big hug over the… and I’m sure everyone else Sarah: else Julia: else

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I enjoyed our time together. I hope you're not upset with me. What do you mean by that? We were going to do something, but it didn’t fit. What do you mean it didn’t fit? Couches don’t fit through doors sometimes. What are you talking about? I fit.

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Hey, how are you? Good. Take care, okay? You're really covered up. I thought I had it bad, but you have it worse. Hey, do you need water or something?

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Hey, kids! Who wants to play Guess Who? I don’t like that game; it’s not inclusive. Introducing the new Guess Who, now with 437 genders! Is your person defined by gender? You can’t determine someone's gender by their appearance; that’s offensive. Does your person look like a traditional female? That’s also reductive and patriarchal. This game is for all families, including single, blended, and LGBTQIA+ families, valuing everyone for who they are. But this game has too many pieces! Do you want it easy or inclusive? Inclusive! Guess Who offers hours of fun, promoting a sense of smug satisfaction about being on the right side of history. Oh, and the game company just added 7 more genders and will send new pieces tonight!

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I see you. Yes, I see you. We both look like big barnies sitting here. We see each other. Translation: I see you. Yes, I see you. We both look like big barnies sitting here. We see each other.

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I'm just heading to the bathroom. What are you doing in the girl's bathroom? I'm a trans girl. But, you're not a girl. Oh, we're doing all of this now. Interesting. I've never heard of this before, and I don't know what to say. I'm sorry you feel that way. I pay a lot of money to feel safe in the bathroom. Me too. Excuse me. Weird. Do you think that's okay?
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