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If you're having trouble sleeping, try Bidentica, a sleep aid made from Joe Biden press conferences. It contains confusion and forgetfulness to calm overactive brains. Users have reported better sleep and even passing out from it. However, side effects may include lying, inability to secure borders, and hallucinations. Ask your doctor about Bidentica today. Translation: If you're struggling to sleep, consider Bidentica, a sleep aid made from Joe Biden press conferences. It helps calm overactive minds with confusion and forgetfulness. Users have experienced improved sleep and even passing out from it. However, side effects may include lying, inability to secure borders, and hallucinations. Consult your doctor about Bidentica.

Roll up your sleeve; this won't hurt and is good for you. I’m not letting you stick that in me. Our records show you’ve never had a technician. I’m not getting jabbed, and I’m not going to. Goodbye, and take these. I’ve heard enough.

If you're having trouble sleeping, try Bidentica, a sleep aid made from Joe Biden press conferences. It contains a blend of confusion and forgetfulness. Users have reported better sleep after taking it. However, side effects may include rapid lying and an inability to secure borders. Ask your doctor about Bidentica today. Translation: If you are having difficulty sleeping, consider trying Bidentica, a sleep aid made from Joe Biden press conferences. It contains a mixture of confusion and forgetfulness. Users have reported improved sleep after using it. However, side effects may include rapid lying and an inability to secure borders. Consult your doctor about Bidentica.

I only want you, Pookie. To get over a breakup, get under someone else. Clean this side well. What's one move in bed that pleases a man?

Thank you. I'm not allowed to be in a room when the lights turn off. That's what I'm going to think. Listen.

Speaker: Hello? Oh my goodness. Take off your pants. Can you not touch it? No, don't touch it.

Speaker 0: Like, intentionally going to that voice tamps down the negative emotions, which I'm convinced make me dumber in the moment, interfere with my capacity to process information. Got reasons for that. Layman's reasons. No scientific, academically rigorous studies that have been in any journals. Speaker 0: Got reasons for that. Speaker 0: Layman's reasons. Speaker 0: No scientific, academically rigorous studies that have been in any journals. Speaker 1: Well, after you're done, I'm going to tell you something that will perhaps be astonishing to you as to why there's real neuroscience behind that late night FMDJ voice having an impact on other people's brains. Speaker 0: But I yeah. And and I'll do that because it calms me down.

I understand you might have preconceptions about therapy, but I'm here to help. Let's start with a Rorschach test. I'll show you some inkblots, and you tell me what you see. What do you see? A tree. Good. How about this one? I see Mike Wazowski in wedding lingerie. Seriously? Yeah, he's ready for his wedding night. Okay, next image. Olaf from Frozen running away with Elsa's talk, but she's enjoying it. Interesting. What about this one? That's Snoopy in a red Speedo, walking Charlie Brown. That's a butterfly. Alright, last one. That’s Bandit from Bluey on a sex swing with a gag, and Mike Wazowski in the mirror. Congratulations, Ralphie. You are the craziest man in Boston.

I sit on the stand and it gets hot. I have hairy legs that turn blonde in the sun. Kids used to come and rub my straightened leg, watching the hair come back up. I learned about roaches and kids jumping on my lap. I love when kids jump on my lap.

I can't feel my legs. Go back. I can't see my legs. You're okay.

I used to think that if I could have someone else do all the talking and ceremonies while I stayed in my basement in sweats with an earpiece, that would be fine.

I sit on the stand and it gets hot. I have hairy legs that turn blonde in the sun. Kids used to rub my leg in the pool and watch the hair come back up. I learned about roaches and kids jumping on my lap. I love kids jumping on my lap.

I used to trust the news until I discovered a brain for common sense. A brain helps with stupidity, questioning news sources, and thinking independently. Side effects may include accountability and a better understanding of economics. Choose a brain for reality. Visit tryabrain.com for more information. Translation: I used to trust the news until I discovered a brain for common sense. A brain helps with stupidity, questioning news sources, and thinking independently. Side effects may include accountability and a better understanding of economics. Choose a brain for reality. Visit tryabrain.com for more information.

I used to be human, but I still am. Being human means that certain things will bother you.

I'm my own medic, mental coach, and nutritionist. Doing the right things makes you better. Taking twenty minutes of sun is helpful. The sun is good for the body in moderation; thirty minutes is good, but all day is bad. At thirty-six, I'm still here. My sponsor is Finito.

You're late. It's her fault. Do you have the money? $2. Thank you, you're my savior. Something wrong? You look pale. My computer. Have you ever felt unsure if you're awake or dreaming? All the time. It's called "mesquite." Maybe we should unplug. Should we leave? We'll be okay. Translation: You are late because of her. Do you have the money? Thank you, you are my savior. Is something wrong? You look paler than usual. My computer. Have you ever felt unsure if you are awake or dreaming? It happens to me all the time. It's called "mesquite." Maybe we should unplug. Should we leave? We will be fine.

"If you are watching TV late at night, like especially after nine p. M, you can measure your testosterone levels the next day and they might be like 50% of what they were the day before." "So for a man, if you do that day in, day out, the cumulative effect is quite destructive to your health overall." "Men should have really high testosterone levels." "Netflix and chill at your own risk, guys."

I call it the wheel. It rules! A bagel is better, though. This fork—I've got ten! We conduct business outside, like humans. This coffee is new...awful! I'm jittery. Sign here, Hancock! Gentlemen, have you lost your minds? People have the right to vote—even stupid ones! Edison, it stinks! You're wasting your time. You might as well put dishes in the shower. We're putting mail on the moon?! I can't even get tuna without celery! It's too small, it's full! I'm never wrong. George, I left my cane in there! That's an expensive cane!

What's one move in bed that drives a man wild? You have to give him that hawk toons. I said it all night. You get me? I don't get you. I think you need to demonstrate. Hawk toons. That's right.

I squeak like a chirping grasshopper or a squeaky screen door. I want to be a backup girl. What's wrong with Justin's hair? We need a global movement. Men think we go from oral to anal, but I don't anymore. I think about Lisa and horses. Welcome back. Kader is spelled k h a d r. Omar Connery has more class than the entire cabinet. Thank you.

Thanks for having me, Colin. By the way, my eyes are down here. So, I’m glad about the ruling in the UK that makes bald jokes off-limits. I’m tired of them! I’ve heard all the jokes, like how my head looks like an old spice deodorant when I wear a red turtleneck. Once, during jury duty with other bald men, the defendant joked we looked like a carton of eggs. And yes, I lotion my head because it gets dry. You probably make insensitive jokes, like asking if the carpet matches the drapes. No, it’s actually quite hairy down there! All this talk is making me sweaty. I dare you to laugh! By the way, I’m also impotent. Don’t laugh. Just go away.

I sit on the stand and it gets hot. I have hairy legs that turn blonde in the sun. Kids used to rub my leg down in the pool to straighten the hair. I learned about roaches and kids jumping on my lap. I enjoy when kids jump on my lap.

Speaker 0 says: We make energy from sunlight. People who are in the sun eat less food. Let your kids be outside in the sun. Take their shirts off. Let them run around barefoot on the grass. You know what you get from the ground? You get electrons. The same thing. It's straight free energy. What runs through a mitochondria that makes all the ATP the electron transfer chain it's not a fat acid train it's not a carbohydrate train protein if the sun is a nutrient it is not out to kill you The idea that the sun is giving you cancer is the most asinine, insane gaslighting, ridiculous statement on earth. It makes all life exist. It charges everything. We are alive because of the power of the sun yet you want to tell people to slather on carcinogenic chemicals, bake it into their skin with the suns and say, oh, that's what's aging you. I'm 51 years old. I've never used sunscreen. I don't have anything done to my face. I eat a ton of meat and I drive a convertible. I want as much as I possibly can get. You know, because it makes me younger. They're lying to you. They've lied about almost everything. Do the opposite of what the government says.

I sarcastically mention Obama's name to highlight that others may be influencing our country. I believe Ron DeSantis and the radical leftist information machine are destroying our country. They accuse me of being cognitively impaired like Biden, but I know both names well. I recently took a cognitive test and aced it. Biden should take one too to explain his policies like open borders, lack of energy independence, woke military, high inflation, no voter ID, transgender athletes, limited electric vehicles, and a weaponized DOJ and FBI. I urge President Biden to take a cognitive test because something is wrong with him.

Nikki Haley, a Republican candidate, suggests mental competency tests for politicians over 75. The idea is dismissed as ridiculous. The speaker's husband has not considered taking such a test and would never discuss it.