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@AshFarms - Ash Farms

🔴WARNING: These are images of the letter left behind by the shooter to his family. He describes himself as a sad person whose body is in great pain. It is disturbing to read. Because I believe we need to see the dangerous mental illness of transgenderism and the effects on the body of the drugs and the mutilation of human bodies, I have attempted to transcribe as best as I can: To My Family and Friends: I don’t expect forgiveness and I don’t expect any apology I have to hold much weight, but to my family and those close to me, I do apologize for the effects my actions will have on your lives. Please know I care for all of you so much and it pains me to bring this storm of chaos into your lives. This will affect so many more people than the ones that are immediately involved. To my Mother and Father, I am sorry I didn’t turn out as you had hoped. You did not fail me, you gave me so much. I truly appreciate the love you have given me, I feel I was raised to be a good person. I’ve kept those traits of empathy, self-sacrifice, and good character. Please do not think you have failed as parents. I was corrupted by this world and have learned to hate what life is. Life is loss, life is pain. There is too much to accept, too many things to put up with just to live. I’m tired of the pain this world gives out. Please, move on and continue to give your love to my brothers and sisters, and the rest of the world. They may not forgive you but you need to move on from me. Forget my life and the pain I’ve brought. I love you both. Thank you for everything. I’m sorry. To my Siblings, I am sorry for forever tainting the rest of your lives. Your careers, lives, relationships, all will be turned upside-down. Please hold on to who you are, not who I am. Change your names if you must. I wish I could tell you that before I go. Please know that I love you all and truly appreciate the time I have spent with you. I have such an amazing family and it hurts me to throw this wrench into the works of you good people. I feel hope when with you, I cherish our time together. I appreciate all that you have taught me and I felt inspired to be like you when I grew up. I hope you are able to move on and continue your lives without being forever followed, forever haunted, by my actions. Forget me and all that I am. Hold onto yourselves and your loved ones, I love you all. And to my friends, I trust you all to give your memory of me however you see fit. I am sorry for the confusion and heartbreak this will bring. I truly appreciate all of you for showing me a good life and helping me through dark times. I have had so many good times that gave me hope, unfortunately this world has too much pain to deal out that I can’t cover up with the good sides of life. I hope you all can move on and forget the pain I’ve caused. I have wanted this for so long. I am not well. I am not right. I am a sad person, haunted by these thoughts that do not go away. I know this is wrong but I can’t seem to stop myself. I am severely depressed and have been suicidal for years. Only recently have I lost all hope and decided to perform my final action against this world. I don’t want to kneel down for the injustices of this world. I want to die. I’d rather die on my feet than live on my knees, constantly in pain. I think I am dying of cancer. It’s a tragic end, as it’s entirely self-inflicted. I did this to myself, as I cannot control myself and have been destroying my body through vaping and other means. I think I have lung cancer. I have felt many pains that make me think I am past the point of recovery. I do not want to recover. I do not want to throw my life away by rotting in a hospital bed. I don’t want the rest of my life to be as a cancer patient, in and out of hospitals, constantly being freaked about with people afraid to be too happy around me. Fuck That! I want to go out on my own means. Unfortunately, due to my depression, anger, and twisted mind, I want to fulfill a final act that has been in the back of my head for years. You all are what keep me going. I find no more interest in anything material. I have only an interest in my mission and love for my family. If I didn’t have such an amazing group of people around me, I would have been gone much sooner. I just want to escape from this world. Escape from the constant bills, shitty jobs, shitty people, and injustices of America. I am done with this, I will not bow. I will be selfish, and leave you to pick up the pieces. It’s my fault. Blame me, but please move on. Whether you accept my apologies or not, I hope you all can move past this and continue your lives. Remember to be good people. Now more than ever the world needs more love, even if you don’t get it in return. Please find hope, find love, and stand up to injustice. I love you all, I will remember you. Pray for the victims and their families. I Love You ♥ Dad, Mom, Jack, Martha, Theresa, Joe, Jared, Phil, Liam - Robin M Westman 2002–2025 (P.S. T, get over yourself and make up with Mom. She loves you. You need to grow up and accept that time just keeps on fucking moving. You either will stay in the past and rot, wasting your life and happiness away, or you can grow up and move on from things. We all love you.) (P.P.S. I wouldn’t recommend any of you to read my journals, unless you REALLY want to; but be warned.)