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@Out5p0ken - Outspoken™️
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Video Transcript AI Summary
God created Trump as a bizarre, incompetent leader with strange habits and a questionable character. Trump is described as a deceitful, vulgar man who is unfit for his position. Despite his flaws, God chose him to be a symbol of chaos and absurdity.
Full Transcript
Speaker 0: And on June 14, 1946, God lost a bet with Satan, and Satan said, pay up. So God made Trump. God said, I need someone willing to get up before dawn to call Fox and Friends, hypnotize Brian Kilmeade, beg for money, bang a porn star, get someone killed, pay off a porn star, and tweet until noon until he stumbles into work wearing a Big Mac like an alien facehugger. So God gave us Trump. God said, I need a sweaty swindler with arms long enough to cheat at golf, but hands small enough to order off the kids menu.
Someone who could sell shit to a shithole or a cock ring to Lolo Jones at a purity ring kiosk. Flatulent fraud to wank a warmonger, shank a translator, filet a potentate, hide a bone saw, sell a secret, come home hungry, stop at KFC, promise to pay for everyone's meals. Duck the check. Call the first lady having lunch with friends in a different state. Then tell the lady she needs a moment alone with the first lady because she should probably get tested for hepatitis.
And to be sure to come back real soon, ladies, especially the ones with behemoth lasongas. So god gave us Trump. I need a savage beast, soothed by kid rock whistling dixie, bewildered by water, incontinent enough to wear a triple x l diaper secured by exo skeletal girdle, hydraulic lift, and bioweapons containment team willing to give their lives for the love child of a Habsburg inbred and a necrotic squash, a flimflam philanderer who can turn shit to gold, gold to shit, soybean farmers to welfare queens, a reeking rake who can't read but speaks in tongues, manifesting mind comp like a riddling roused Rhonda Byrne Ubermensch, so god give us crump. God said I need a tacky trickster who writes like a 4th grader, talks like a 3rd grader, cheats like a fornicator, brags like a compensator, and dresses like a head waiter who wears golf leads to church, allows to lean 60 degrees and 3 inch lifts, waddling down a ramp, grabbing a steering wheel, tear gassing a book club with the fetid charnel house miasma of splenetic emissions escaping his manly sweat glands and ass pores, all the while bankrupting a casino, chiseling the Secret Service, stealing government staplers, losing a lawsuit, inciting a riot, looking up his daughter's skirt with shoe mirrors, and masturbating on a Bible.
So God made Trump. And God said, I need an absentee father, deadbeat debtor, vengeful Bulgarian, to be my champion with a golden mane, and the mane shall extend a hand's breath below the ear on the right, 1 cubit below the ear on the left, 2 cubits from the crown to the upper back. The back shall be firehosed forward, transected like a lattice crust of the world's rankest pork pie, raked back and secured with the least woke hair product from among the Canaanites. But the bald patch in the center of the garden, you shall not touch, for it is holy to the lord.