reSee.it - Tweets Saved By @jon_d_doe
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
The 33-year-old man dating a 23-year-old lady did a lot of work in trying to teach, groom, and mold his girlfriend. That's how it should be done. I did the same but at a much younger age. Which for me, is still the most recommended. Most of the men in their late 20s and early
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
30s said they would not have such patience or mental capacity to deal with such a lady. Recall that a few days ago, I had said men may not marry a woman that they've not "brainwashed". And that women may not marry men that they have not healthily "manipulated". But I also
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
said something when I shared my story. I said family background & upbringing matter. And that if she has it, it's a good start. Let's use the man's story as a case study here. 1) Her mother. He had said that her mother is disrespectful to her father and that she even brings
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
men into the house after the father had left them. According to him, he has been able to teach her that the ways of her mother are not the right way & that it'll not help her. My stand has always been that before you choose your wife, choose her mother. And that men should be
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
careful with their decisions in marrying a lady raised by a single mother. Is he willing to be an exception? From his story, it seems he's willing. He knows his girlfriend more than we all do. So let's wish him the best that things remain that way. 2) Her father. He said
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
that he has been able to teach his girlfriend about the need to have a good relationship with her father. That for me, is a good move, and with her father being close to her, he can help the man in the future to tame his wife (if he marries her). 3) Her friends. He said her
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
friends are into clubbing and hookups. And that when he did his investigation, he discovered that his girlfriend was different. He also said that he was able to sever the relationship she had with her friends and her friends now admire her. Recall I had said when you catch them
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
Young, you should quickly separate her from her bad friends & teach and "brainwash" her. It appears from his story that he did that. 4) He has past relationships. At 23, she had already dated 5 men. For me, I would want to say that on average, a 23-year-old lady is more
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
likely to have dated more men when compared to the average number of ladies a 23-year-old young man would have dated. Especially if she's not a virgin. Well, she told him it's 5. However, did she also come clean with her actual number of body counts? We can't say and we can
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
never say. 5) She was the one that deflowered him. It's unclear in his story if he made that known to her or he kept it to himself. If it's the former, well he should brace up for the future taunts that may come with it. If it's the latter, all well and good. What is most
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
important is that he says they have good sexual compatibility. 6) Destroying properties & tearing of clothes. Before I shared his DM yesterday, I shared a thread that I wrote last year. Telling you people my experience with my wife in that aspect. I don't know but I can
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
tell you all that most of you would experience the same in one form or the other. Before you react negatively, please think thoroughly. Is it worth breaking up for? What is the guarantee that the next woman you meet won't do the same or even worse? You must use every
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
moment of disappointment as a teaching opportunity. As long as the disappointment doesn't cross your red lines. I recall I shared a DM story from a married man whose wife destroyed their expensive TV in a moment of rage. He did not ask to divorce his wife because of that.
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
When she realized her mistake, he used it as a teaching moment for his wife. The relationship is a game, & the smartest persons win. If you truly want to live with a woman, you as the man must be mentally prepared. You don't say because she's an adult, then she must act like
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
one. Holding your woman to the same standard as you may wish to hold yourself is self-deceit. Women are like adult babies. So you must treat them as one. Not even when you're sleeping with her or she's the mother of your kids. You're the leader and you must to a very large
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
extent, show restraints, and maturity. If you're waiting for the one that has no "dirt" on her, you may just be waiting in vain. You're not unblemished yourself. So, I ask again. Are 30+ men willing to deal with < 23-year-old ladies? You need to search your conscience.
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
You're better off with her if both of you belong to the same generation. Because it's easier to understand them & you also have all the time to be patient & groom her. Always remember. Femininity is malleable and masculinity is shrewd. You must work & earn your wife. End.
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
A typical example of how a MIL can destroy her daughter's marriage if she's not careful. Please read this DM carefully and note the red flags I've been teaching for a while. If not that this man decided to be his own man without looking for who to feed him, they would have https://t.co/0PuMvJv8Yi
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
reduced him to nothing because he decided to put eyes in his inlaws' wealth. But he did not allow their wealth to dictate to him on how to run his home and lead his wife. That's the first sign that you're a man and as long as no one is feeding you, they do not have any right https://t.co/YJSbQxtGEm
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
to disrespect you in your home. You have married your wife already. But if you hadn't and you came to me for advise, I would have suggested to you not to. When a wife calls the shot in her matrimonial home, then it may affect the mentality of her daughters towards the way https://t.co/eJnCg7QH3y
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
they see men. Her father (though wealthy), has been dealing with her mother for about 30 years. Thankfully, he's aware of his mistakes and has stood up for you despite all her mother wants to make him believe. Meaning he knows his wife & what she's capable of doing.
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
Unfortunately, your wife doesn't understand what her mother is trying to do to her marriage. Or may be she does but doesn't know how to put her mother in her place. She will have to choose between her mother or her marriage. Tell her that she should not make you regret ever
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
getting married to her. Also, explain to her how the dynamics of the relationship between her parents have affected her. And also, let her know that whatever she saw her mother do to her father ended in her father's house. If she knows she's ready to make the marriage work,
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
she must act like she's willing to and allow you lead her. I must commend you for the way you handled things. Your inlaws disrespected your mother for obvious reasons. That they feel they're doing your family a favour by allowing you marry into their family. If your father
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
were to be a wealthy man like your FIL, can your MIL or your wife try that nonsense. How can they starve your mother even when you're the one providing for your home? Never allow them disrespect your mother that way again. And as for your MIL, do not apologize to her. You
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
don't even need to be calling her on the phone. If she calls you, pick and greet her like an elderly woman. That's it. If she wants to discuss the matter, tell her that you have already discussed with her husband and you do not wish to bring it up again. And that you have
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
cautioned your wife. And she should respect your marriage and allow your wife learn how to be a good and respectful wife. If she is sensible, she will understand what you said to her. As for your MIL younger sister, do not allow her come to your house to live anymore.
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
She's a trouble maker. If she is married, she should face her matrimonial home & respect yours. Always call your FIL. He's a man that's also dealing with his baggage. Lastly, introduce your wife to this page or show her similar DMs. Before she completely self destruct. End.
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
I'm genuinely concerned about the ways some men interpret or apply my teachings. I may not have expressly said it here, but the wise ones can tell the type of life I lived when I was much younger. And they can also tell the type of life I live now. Both lifestyles are
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
distinctively different and it didn't just come overnight. I did not learn it from social media even though I have had my fair share of social media toxicity. Especially from this community that I founded. When I started this community, it was always one insult to the other.
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
Mainly coming from women. "Who hurt you?" "And you say you're married?" "I pity your wife" "You're a toxic man" Name them. But I did not relent and I kept moving and never backed down from my message. Under 4 years, I've had cause to celebrate both men and women who shared
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
their wedding invites with me, and acknowledged how my teachings led them to the right path. I've had cause to celebrate couples who were on the verge of divorce but the teachings rescued their marriage. Sons and daughters reconciling with their parents. And some relationships
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
and marriages packed up. For me, I've strived hard to balance things up between genders. I've not made the teachings one-sided because I know that men and women need each other. So when I read from some young men, I tend to want to consider women who allege that
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
Some men are using my teachings to perpetuate wickedness to women. I agree that women can be manipulative. But what we must realize is that even my wife vehemently disagrees with me a lot of the time. Sometimes, she sees my posts on blogs and we discuss them. Sometimes, she
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
visits my page to read for herself. I don't react negatively to her outburst because she's my wife. She disagrees but with respect. Something I have little tolerance for here because you the woman are not my wife. And I'm not sleeping with you. It's your boyfriend or
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
husbands that you can do that to, not me. But what do I then do? I sit with my wife and explain things to her like she's my daughter. I use numerous examples & sometimes, I use DM stories to show her exactly what I mean. Her point of argument always stems from... "how many
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
wives, do you have? " "How sure are you that this applies to most women?" My response to her is always... A woman is a woman. Then she reclines. And after some hours or days. " Sweetie, that thing you said is true o". Have I not taught her with love, care &
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
patience? We already know that women react quite negatively to fact & logic a lot of the time. Put simply... Cognitive dissonance. For women, it should always be a carrot-and-stick approach. You can't teach women with theory. You can't lead them with force. You can't get
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
them to respect & submit if you if you've not earned it. It's not just you saying "I'm a man". This is why I try to caution young men not to quickly discard a lady because they notice a few red flags. Red flags are not red lines. If there are no red flags you've turned
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
green in your woman, then you've not worked on her. And this is vice versa. Some red flags are created directly from your relationship with each other. Not from an external source. Let me give you a few examples of how some of my teachings are being misinterpreted. 1) Agba
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
said single mothers are red flags, run. Was that it? What I said is that men must be careful & if they've never been married, they should be a 5th option. 2) Women don't love men. If your woman tells you that she loves you, does it mean that you have to react angrily to it?
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
3) Don't play a fatherly role on a woman you're not married to. Does that mean that I said if your girlfriend genuinely needs financial assistance, then you should not give her? If you don't take your time to study the words I use in my teachings, you may destroy a relationship
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
or marriage that has no serious issues. Masculinity is good but the absence of it is toxic. Masculinity is shrewd and femininity is malleable. You can't lead a woman right if you don't first understand their nature. Otherwise, you'll activate her inactive poison. End.
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
Thread on single women that are still virgins. 1) how old are they? 2) why are they still virgins? 3) do they intend to keep it till marriage? 4) are they in a relationship? 1. She's a virgin at 38. https://t.co/zxST14BU1q
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
Women know that once they sign up for marriage, they've given up their right to sleep with other men. They already know (right from the relationship) that it's a given. While they can escape cheating in relationships, they hardly escape it in marriage if caught. By default,
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
they have also prepared their mindset to forgive a cheating husband. Marriage is like a "prison" to women who crave for other men's dick. But it's not so for men. So when a sexually active woman is deliberately delaying marriage, even when there are lots of men flocking around
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
her, she just may be thinking of that lifetime commitment to sexual exclusivity. Especially when you are hoping to marry a sexually active university girl You just may be truncating her "hoe phase". And some of them don't want that. A few days ago, I told us that in
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
relationships, women cheat more and in marriage, men cheat more. This is a fact that only myopic and hypocritical people would deny. As a single man or married man, just do a random survey of the women you've slept with. If you want, you can sleep with 5 different women in a
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
week. Are they all your girlfriends? Are they prostitutes? Don't some of these ladies tell you that they have boyfriends? How many married women are amongst them? Out of every 10 women you sleep with, 9 will be single. Are those married women not feeling horny too?
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
You'll quickly realize that one of the key decisions a woman makes before she gets married is to tell herself that she has to focus on her husband's dick alone. Also, by default, men do not expect their women to cheat. This is why it's difficult to forgive a cheating woman.
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
We know these things already. Except we just wish to pretend. And I'm a man and I'm married. And I know that I'm not an exception to these rules. What then should I tell men? It's simple & not rocket science. When you find a wife, you must know & recognize the key decisions
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
she's making for you. Sexual exclusivity is one of them. And it's indeed a tough decision to make. Especially by a woman you did not deflower and once had sexual relationships with other men. You do not rub your cheating on her face. If you do, you'll trigger her & make her
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
default on her commitment. It's a lot tougher if you're her first and only. But if you're not, it won't be such a hard kill to stray. It's why we have read so many DMs from married men, complaining that their wives still keep in touch with their exes. Women don't forget men
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
they have once been sexual with easily. If she makes that commitment to be faithful to you, she has to stick to it. If you have done nothing to warrant her keeping in touch with her exes, then she never knew why she got married. She just wanted to answer "Mrs". A man and a
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
Women are supposed to commit to faithfulness to each other. But we all know that it's not the case in reality. Not even when some women and society embrace polygamy. So who is deceiving who? When I tell men not to rub these things on the faces of their wives, it's not
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
because I want to encourage you to cheat if you have the opportunity. It's to save your life. Women are selfish and no woman will feel happy knowing that you cheat on her & still deprive her of sex and other needs of hers. The pain and shame she knows she will face if she
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
decides to cheat back, will not let her. But she will take vengeance on you. And if you're not careful, you'll raise another man's child. And she will tell you that she didn't tell you it was your child. You just assumed it was yours because you are married to her. End.
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
Men, Take your time to read this DM to the last screenshot. https://t.co/fiKDiFnYZs
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
As a married woman, Tell your mother more of the good sides of your marriage. And tell your father more of the bad sides. If you tell your mother more of the bad sides, you may become a divorcee or mostly unhappy if you're not careful. And this is not vice versa. End.
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
Dear Men, Please take your time to read this DM. End. https://t.co/TdyJFmSwF6
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
I was with my team from 8 a.m. today till 10 p.m. A team of over 20. This is quite routine for me & everyone has a task to deliver each day. 95% of them are single & in their mid & late 20s. Men & women. Tomorrow, we resume & it will be like that even on Saturday (sometimes)
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
The only rest day for us is Sunday. I didn't call my wife for up to 2 minutes. I didn't speak with my children throughout today & I'm not even with them & have been away for some weeks. I lead the team. As I retired tonight, it crossed my mind again that this is the reality
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
of many 9-5ers. Early this year, it also crossed my mind & I wrote a thread advising young men who are working to make sure they find a girlfriend. You may wish to search for the thread to read for those of you that missed it. The reality of being lonely after school is
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
depressing. You'll not have the luxury of time for a serious relationship. Both men and women. You're building a career and you need to make sure you excel at it. You have passed the stage where you can see your boyfriend or girlfriend & your neck and call. That stage is
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
when you're still in school or jobless. You're chasing money & building your future. As much as I advise men & women not to abandon relationships whilst building their careers, it will be a lot easier if you seize the opportunity of your free days to find one. And when you do,
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
do your best not to mess things up. And this goes especially to young girls. If you tame your greed, lies & deceit and focus on that young serious man, it will be easier for you to find a spouse before you're 30. You'll understand it when he's busy and hardly has the time
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
for you like he used to. Except both of you are cohabiting. Phone calls are good but nothing can be compared to a physical connection. Your job will hardly give you such an opportunity. Now that you're in school, connect with that young man/woman & do all your vetting & lock
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
down your relationship. When others are busy looking for a man or woman to build trust with, you have long passed that stage. Both of you are just gathering resources to start a new life as husband and wife. When you get married, it will just be a formality. You have long
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
been married just that it's not official. This is why when a man has been able to balance life, he finds it harder to find a wife. He cannot trust her. He doesn't know her past. She wasn't there from his struggling days. He has no other options but to impress her with
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
money. And we all know how that pans out in some or most cases, don't we? He's desperate to settle down. She's desperate to settle down. They meet each other & unable to connect because a lot of water has gone under the bridge. You may say "What works for A will not work for
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
B". But if you cast your mind back in time, you will realize the many opportunities you wasted. That young man or woman you toyed with their heart will cross your mind. That one you knew was going to be a good man or woman to you. But you messed things up because of
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
1) cheating 2) lack of belief in your future 3) greed 4) laziness 5) the pursuit of material things 6) because you felt you were broke 7) failure to ask the right questions on time 8) being overzealous 9) poverty of the mind These things happen. In this community, we have read
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
too many examples. Once you do a self-assessment of yourself and compare yourself to 5 years ago and now, you'll see that you've grown. Your lack of foresight and patience has caused you many things. But time waits for no one. Like they say... The best time to plant a tree
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
was 20 years ago. The next best time is now. I've gone through it & I feel I'm authorized & experienced to teach you the younger ones. It's out of love. Not to mock your situation. But to encourage you that if you learn from other's experiences, you won't be a victim. End.
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
Please read this DM from a married man and read carefully, my submission on his case. I'll put it straight to you. You acted like you didn't have any other choice and your wife settled for you. She saw you were desperate to marry her from day one & she took advantage of your https://t.co/g3J4ofaNOB
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
desperation to have her "best" times. I'll say this to you and I'll say the same to all single men reading. Never you meet any single lady for the first time, & you tell her you want to marry her. It doesn't matter how beautiful you think she is. It doesn't matter what sweet
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
the attitude she portrayed. It doesn't matter what pleasant words people around her use on her. Do not ever say such to any lady. If you do, she'll start to play a script for you. Acting all "nice" & playing to the gallery. She'll see you as desperate & will cheat on you at
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
any given time if she wishes to. You, on the other hand, are playing the marriage card & a responsible man. It sounds cool in theory & quite idealistic. But in reality, it is mostly a recipe for disaster. Women, ugly or beautiful, are all looking forward to marriage. It's a
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
key prayer point in their lives. Don't make it easy for them because if you do, they'll take advantage of it & blame you for their deeds. After all, you were the one who saw her and told her you wanted to marry her just like that. Back to the man in the DM. You made the
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
a first mistake by telling a woman you just met within a few hrs, that "she's your wife". God gave you a 2nd chance to save yourself by going through her father to reject you, but you were adamant. God delayed it for 7years to see if you could open your eyes but you were blind.
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
Now you've finally married her and within 2 months, God has revealed to you what he had always warned you about. But God frowns at divorce. And as far as I'm concerned, your wife is not adulterous. From your story, you did not say she committed adultery. I can't even
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
say she cheated on you in the "relationship". It was clear from the word go that her father rejected you. So she could not go against her father's decision. She told you this. It was never hidden. You couldn't expect her to stay faithful to you when her fate was hanging in
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
in the balance. But eventually, she settled for you. One question that should come to your mind is this. For the 7 years her father rejected you, did her father reject other suitors too? How come she did not take one of those men she was sleeping with to see her father?
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
Was she not good enough for at least one of them? Do you now understand what I meant by God was trying to save you? A meat that was rejected by different men for 7 years, you saw it and insisted that you must eat it. Now you've eaten it. And your eyes have been opened.
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
Unfortunately, you cannot accuse her of cheating. But the information you have come to know about will change your feelings forever. Your ego has been badly bruised. And your wife is going to observe how you handle things going forward. And it also depends on the type of
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
info you have. Was she sleeping with those men as a result of a relationship she hoped would lead to marriage, or she was just sleeping with random men for hookups? That will make you decide which steps you'll take next. But to me. It doesn't matter. You shouldn't have
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
married her in the first place. You were naive, impulsive & suffering from oneitis. You don't spend 7 years of your life, begging a family to accept you as a son-in-law. You spend it building yourself so they'll be happy to make you their son-in-law. I wish you well. End.
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
It was in this community that a married woman was gifted 200k for her birthday by her husband. The husband later asked her to lend him 20k but she didn't give him. She then went ahead to repair her faulty phone without telling her husband. But he asked her for 20k and she
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
she didn't give him. She never thought she did anything wrong. Her husband wasn't pleased with her decision and he started acting up. Then she ran to me for advice. I told her that she should not have done that especially when he asked her for money. And that her husband
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
knew her phone was faulty and he had it in mind to fix it for her but she should be patient. I then advised her on what to do. A few weeks later, she returned to give feedback. It worked. Do I know her? Do I live with them? Do I know her husband? She was grateful because
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
she had initially thought it was no big deal. No, it's a big deal. The fact that some men won't talk immediately does not mean they're okay with it. On the trending video of the woman whose husband abandoned her and their two kids. In her words, she said she was the provider
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
and she felt it was perfectly okay to do that. She also said that she felt she had money to buy a car and she bought it in her name without first seeking her husband's views. That was the first time she noticed his negative reaction but she thought nothing of it at the time.
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
Now, what has happened to her marriage? It has been crashed. First, she sounded like her husband was a lazy man. I've repeatedly said that women should enable lazy men. Now, let's even say he's not a lazy man. I can bet you, the same thing was likely going to happen. I need
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
women to understand these things. A man's ego is his weapon and his provision is his shield. It's why when a man is incapable of providing for his family, he feels incomplete & sometimes, depressed. The last thing any responsible husband would wish for is to see his wife
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
being the provider. To avoid this, men must live within their means. If a woman feels she can assist him, she must do so with wisdom without disarming him (ego). It's why I said a wise wife will lead from behind. She is making key decisions but making her husband lead from
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
the front. A broke man who is not lazy will never be comfortable seeing his wife play his role. If you don't apply wisdom during his downtimes, he would silently resent you & you'd make him feel incompetent. While you may think you're doing these things for "love", you're
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
hurting your marriage. It starts with relationships. Learn how to recognize that your man will be the provider when you get married. Practice restraints and ego fanning & watch it work like magic. You can achieve peace and even get whatever you want from him if you
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
know how to press his mumu button. A world where women think that just because they have their money then they can be independent will never work well for women. If you don't make your man feel that you can depend on him, he will start looking for women who can show him that.
@jon_d_doe - High Chief Àgbà
And by that, your marriage will start to see serious friction. That man you felt was hitherto okay with it, will one day explode & his next plan would be to make you crumble. If you are attentive to his mood & words, you'll know that trouble is looming. But you love him. End.
@jon_d_doe - Àgbà
Lawyers, but what if the chats contain threatening or fraudulent messages?
@jon_d_doe - Àgbà
A woman's fulfilment in life is to be a wife, mother & raise responsible children. Having a successful career or business is just a plus. If she doesn't have them, it doesn't make her a failure. If she succeeds as a mother & wife, she's done great in life. Cheers to 240k
@jon_d_doe - Àgbà
Don't let feminism ruin you. Being a feminine woman is beautiful. Being a wife is beautiful. Being a mother is beautiful. Look forward to being married and serve your husband to the best of your ability. Love & raise your children right & be their prize. End.
@jon_d_doe - John Doe
You may believe you're leading your woman right and also doing your best to give her hope. But you can't entirely fault her, if along the way, she starts to tell you that suitors are coming for her. Especially if she is aware that you're not ready and it will take a little
@jon_d_doe - John Doe
time and patience. So the whatsapp chat we are discussing can be looked at, in different ways. 1) The man was honest to his reality, knowing full well that he wasn't ready. So instead of leading her on, and taking the risks, he decided to let her go. 2) if he had decided not
@jon_d_doe - John Doe
to let her go, is he sure of himself? Perhaps, he took the safer route to avoid being blamed tomorrow. He left didn't give her a choice to stay. 3) before a woman will start telling you that suitors are coming, she has already started considering them. 4) she may also have told
@jon_d_doe - John Doe
you, just so you can hasten up, and come to marry her, even if she knows you're not really ready. Always remember, relationship is a game and the smartest persons win. While you as a man, will wish to marry her, you must make sure you do it when you feel it's right. If you bow
@jon_d_doe - John Doe
to the pressure when you're not ready, you'll set yourself up for failure. And after you get married, no one will listen to you, that she was the one who pressurized you, into marrying her. "Are you not a man?" That's the response you'll be getting from both her, & outsiders.
@jon_d_doe - John Doe
But one thing I'm very sure of, is that women are more loyal to their feelings than your sacrifices. If her feelings don't align with your sacrifices, she will not stay. And she will look for all justifiable reasons to leave you, and be unapologetic about it. So, that my wife
@jon_d_doe - John Doe
never told me that, doesn't mean your own girlfriend will not tell you. What you should do, is to throw the question back to her. "what do you want to do?" "you and I know I'm not ready now, so are you willing to wait?" Don't tell her to go ahead to marry just because you're
@jon_d_doe - John Doe
not ready. Chances are, that she wants to consider the suitor, but doesn't want to feel guilty about it. Or she needs you to assure her because truth be told, you're not the only one that is admiring her. Whether she tells you or not. Men still admire married women, how much
@jon_d_doe - John Doe
more a girlfriend? What you expect is for her to create boundaries for you, regardless. Before writing this thread, I had to ask my wife again.. "But why didn't you tell me about those suitors before we got married?" "Sweetie, it wasn't necessary because I was not considering
@jon_d_doe - John Doe
them". Infact, I just found out today, that a Canadian based man was also amongst the suitors. He was in Canada at the time & already established. She didn't choose him & the reason is best known to her. Again, I've always said that everyone should be selfish with their
@jon_d_doe - John Doe
choices of choosing their spouses. Because it's expected that whomever you choose, you must become selfless in the marriage. You'll no longer see marrying your spouse, as doing him or her a favour. If both of you are not selfish for each other, then one person can decide to
@jon_d_doe - John Doe
look elsewhere. If your woman doesn't trust you enough to lead her, she will not stay. Women are gifted with foresight. A woman who believes in you, will wait for you & damn the consequences. If she wholeheartedly made you her choice, she will be willing to face whatever
@jon_d_doe - John Doe
outcomes the marriage brings. She will not tell you.. "you forced me to marry you" "I wish I married my ex" "I wish I considered my suitors" Why? Because marriage requires deliberate commitment. "I saw & I'm seeing other men, but I chose you. So I'll make sure we work".
@jon_d_doe - John Doe
In all you do in your relationship, ensure you're not deceiving each other. Whatever promises or commitments you've made, ensure you keep them. And ensure you're walking the talks. If she/he senses you're deceitful, then don't blame them when they choose to walk away. End.