reSee.it - Related Post Feed
@jbranninglaw - Jenifer Branning
Happy Thanksgiving from the Branning clan! So thankful for freedom and family! https://t.co/X6UXxDyoef
@jbranninglaw - Jenifer Branning
Merry Christmas to all from the Branning family! We wish everyone a blessed and joyous holiday. - Chancy, Jenifer, Ethan, Ellis & Evan https://t.co/j0qieK2r0l
@jbranninglaw - Jenifer Branning
Happy Thanksgiving from the Branning family! https://t.co/vOXTTjJvoD
@VP - Vice President Kamala Harris
From our family to yours, happy Thanksgiving. https://t.co/Nhifx0sHi5
@JUSTcatmeme - Mittens
Happy Thanksgiving!!! https://t.co/FmBMrYJLlX
Video Transcript AI Summary
If you don't have one of these for Christmas, I'm not coming. I’ve got some potatoes on it, but if you don’t have this, I’m out. Is it Timna? Where’s Footsie? I’m flipping the top, but my cousin makes it better. If you don’t have one of these, I’m not coming for Thanksgiving either. This isn’t anything like what Kurt made before.
Full Transcript
Speaker 0: Good. No. What's wrong with you, Riley? Uh-uh. If you ain't got one of these for Christmas You ain't got nothing.
Ain't coming. I ain't coming. Good old coons. I got some taters on it. I ain't coming.
You ain't got one of these. I'm not coming. Is it Timna? Is it Timna Barton? Yeah.
That's right. Uh-uh. And you got oh, no. Where's Footsie? Uh-uh.
I'm flipping the top. But look at that. Now you had a footsie. My cousin cooked some better than this. Yeah.
If you ain't got one of these, I ain't coming on you. For Thanksgiving, for Baby, enough. Baby, this ain't ain't nothing like what what Kurt did before.
@OceanBQ1971 - OceanBlue
@JackStr42679640 Gifts for all.. 🥾🎁🥂🌞✔️ https://t.co/p0fteusSTT
Video Transcript AI Summary
I dream of a Christmas where all criminals are exposed and justice is served. I hope for a Christmas filled with truth and transparency, where even the most powerful are held accountable. I envision a Christmas where we can all come together and move forward, leaving behind the lies and deceit.
Full Transcript
Speaker 0: I'm dreaming of a white hat Christmas
Speaker 1: When every crook will be exposed, and the people Listen to trials that give more prison. I'm dreaming of a white hat, Christmas. With every truth the post I write, may your children We I'm dreaming of a white hat Christmas And Elvis swing in, and princess dye has a healthy glow. I'm dreaming of a white hat Christmas. Where we go on, we go old.
And the truth is laid out for all. I'm dreaming of a white hat of Christmas with every truth of false When they look, they're liars
@Thekeksociety - DR. Kek
D I D YOU KNOW THIS ABOUT C H R I S T M A S ? COMMENT 👇 https://t.co/3vyDT6VDcJ
Video Transcript AI Summary
Viewer discretion is advised as the speaker discusses the origins of Christmas. They explain that Christmas evolved from the Roman holiday Saturnalia, which involved gift-giving, drunkenness, and mistreatment of women. The Protestant church outlawed Christmas until the 1800s. The speaker also mentions that Christmas has pagan origins, with worshipers of the god Molech sacrificing babies during the winter solstice. They connect the tradition of sitting children on Santa's lap to this dark history. The speaker further explains that Santa Claus was originally seen as demonic, and the "ho ho ho" laugh came from a figure called Robin Goodfellow, associated with the devil. They criticize the celebration of Christmas as a distraction from societal issues like government corruption, brainwashing in schools, and economic struggles.
Full Transcript
Speaker 0: Now you
Speaker 1: can stay if you want, but viewer discretion is advised. Y'all over here participating in ritualistic, satanic, sensualized traditions and don't even know it? And, yes, I was that kid crying on Santa's lap. Because why does this man know what I'm sleeping and know when I'm awake? Basically, omnipresent.
I'm in the shower thing. He's gonna know if I don't scrubbing between pinky toe enough. And that's kinda weird to me. Y'all do know in the 1800, Christmas was forbidden, deemed sacrilege, and the original version was even banned in ancient Rome. I'm a let Huey explain.
Speaker 0: The truth is Christmas evolved from the Roman holiday Saturnalia, a winter festival where men gave gifts to each other. They also would get drunk, have sex with each other, and beat their wives. People would act so crazy on Christmas. The holiday was outlawed by the Protestant church until the 1800.
Speaker 1: Oh, that's not the darkest parts of the origins of it. Let's keep going. Yeah. Christmas was forbidden, deemed sacrilege. Let's ask Jehovah's Witnesses why they don't celebrate These festivals are massively contaminated by pagan customs, so we know that it's originated from a pagan holiday.
Right? During the winter solstice, you know, December 5th. There were worshipers of a pagan god named Molech, and babies were offered as sacrifices. The statue was made of brass, and burning fire would be in it. And the babies would sit in the hot brass arms of Molech while the child is arsoned to death.
They would beat drums to cover up the screams. And while this would happen, and the parents would have a list of wishes that they wanted for the year. So that whole thing of sitting your kids on Santa's lap and taking pictures with them while they're crying, remember where that came from. Now let's talk about center clause, Old Saint Nick. Old Nick means the devil, Satan.
Before Christmas was actually created by Clark Clement Moore, prior to 18/23, Santa Claus Christmas didn't really exist like that he was more demonic. Oh, yeah. And that ho ho ho laugh came from a half man, half stag, you know, with horns and stuff called Robin Goodfellow. Robin in medieval terms also means devil. He would take kids away on that whole goat situation with children and defeat.
Not to mention that people are engaging and spending all of this fake printed money, and don't take the credit for it, knowing what this government is doing to us as citizens. Because it's a jolly town, we forget about the bad conditions of this country. The fake news. Fake food, paying for water, trafficking, corruption, tyrannized laws, Brainwashing of our children being sent to school to learn how to be slaves. Tyranized laws, inflation of even just trying to survive.
Working jobs that put us on autopilot for 6 ears. Code switching like we're robots to serve people who spit in people's face and throw food. Grown adults who misdirect their dramatic emotions to teenagers over straws and barbecue sauce. So I get why y'all trying to celebrate these pagan holidays to take the pain away from these messed up conditions of this laboratory rate of consciousness that is affecting our conditions.
@TheEyes2022 - Doctor Dr McHonk-Honk
Need a new Christmas song.🤣🤣🤣🤣 https://t.co/8tZ80szZ52
Video Transcript AI Summary
My friends are affected by climate change, but they're fortunate to have received vaccinations. I've made money from vaccinating livestock. Let's have a party tonight, but you'll need a vaccine pass. We've booked a DJ who will play PC Christmas songs. The dress code is latex puppy headwear. We're facing multiple health issues like COVID, flu, and monkeypox. We need a lockdown until we have a booster vaccine. Vaccinating against gullibility will help people wake up. The vaccines may not always work. I'm excited for the new year and the new climate laws. Merry Christmas to everyone.
Full Transcript
Speaker 0: My friends are dropping. All right, Bee. They've all been struck by climate change. It would've been worse if they hadn't had their jib jabs. You fucking morons are so deranged.
I've made a fortune from jabbing livestock. I've had a seizure. I'm to Axe to the max. We're gonna have a party tonight. I'll be standing at and you're asking for your vaccine pass.
Take your party up your eyes. I've booked a DJ, a black Trans Ukrainian. Them will be playing PC Christmas songs. There's a dress code. It's latex puppy headwear.
A fucking freak show of chubby Raymond and songs. We're on the verge of a hex epidemic. COVID, flu, strep a, monkeypox, climate heart attacks, and gullibility. We need a We could break a lockdown, baby. We need people like you to shut the fuck up, Leonard, just until we have a hexavalent boost in monkey delay.
If you Vaccinate against gullibility. People will wake up surely. The vaccines won't work. They never do. Oh, yeah.
We're going to have a party tonight. Right. I'm going to find a girl. Trans or just an actual girl who'll kiss by candlelight. Unless she's Tribes, I'm so excited for the new year.
Climate law, doids on a brand new strip, x, eating wood lice because cow fatted the planet. Merry Christmas, you stupid twice. Merry Christmas, everyone. Smush, everyone.
@Partisangirl - Syrian Girl 🇸🇾🎗
Christmas greetings from the holy land. Have you begun festivities with your family yet? https://t.co/R5eA4GGNmP
@DiedSuddenly_ - DiedSuddenly
This Klaus Schwab Christmas video is hilarious. We hope you enjoy it as much as we did. A very Merry Christmas to Died Suddenly fans! Never forget. Never comply. https://t.co/PR5SvN0WLi
Video Transcript AI Summary
The speaker expresses their desire for a "great reset" similar to communism, highlighting concerns about surveillance, lockdowns, COVID tests, boosters, deaths, and potential genocide. They mention police presence and express a feeling of despair. The speaker then shifts to a Christmas theme, stating that they don't want much for Christmas except freedom and the well-being of the world. They end by emphasizing their desire for the listener's soul.
Full Transcript
Speaker 0: The Verb enslavement for whom presents Maximus its 23. I'm dreaming of a great reset like communism just in smart. The history said election and detection and tone surveillance everywhere. I'm feet. I'm on the 5th day of lockdown.
My government gave me 5 For COVID test, see boosters, to sudden deaths, an attempted genocide. Police at your door. Feet. Feet. I'm I don't want a lot for Christmas.
Just feet. I'm just I'm Please kill me. I just want to hold the world. Every tree and every bird, that is my goal. All I want for Christmas is your soul.
@PapiTrumpo - il Donaldo Trumpo
MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!🎄🎄🎄
Video Transcript AI Summary
The president and I wish all Americans a Merry Christmas. Christians celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ and spread love to others. We are grateful for our military, police, and law enforcement who keep us safe. We pray for our service members away from home and hope for peace among nations. The Trump family wishes everyone a joyful Christmas and a happy new year.
Full Transcript
Speaker 0: The president and I want to wish each and every American a very Merry Christmas.
Speaker 1: At this sacred time of year, Christians celebrate the birth of our lord and savior Jesus Christ and rejoice in his love for every person. We give thanks for the millions of Americans who come together to care for others with compassion and bring the warmth and bliss of this holy season to our families, our friends, our neighbors, and to those in need.
Speaker 0: As we gather with loved ones this holiday, Americans across this land are grateful for all the men and women in uniform who keeps us safe, our military, our Our police and everyone in law enforcement.
Speaker 1: We say a special prayer for those military service members stationed far from home, and we renew our hope for peace among nations and joy to the world, on behalf of the entire Trump family, we wish everyone a joyous and merry Christmas and a very happy, happy new year.
@RandPaul - Rand Paul
It's that time of year again. Happy #Festivus! I've got a lot of problems with you people! And now, you're gonna hear about it. https://t.co/cZaMOHmA2x
@RandPaul - Rand Paul
I’m back with more #Festivus joy! Shall we?
reSee.it AI Summary
Team @Ripple and the #XRPArmy have shown their unity and determination in the face of challenges. The power-hungry money cartel has no limits in their pursuit of dominance. From 2017 to 2023, the redistribution of power and wealth has revealed the destructive nature of greed. A better world is on the horizon as the current oppressive forces meet their end. Merry Christmas to all, and may we find harmony and enlightenment on earth. #KUWL
@KuwlShow - Rob Cunningham | KUWL.show
Against all odds, driven by principle, fueled by virtue, and fearless in pursuit of destiny, Team @Ripple and the #XRPArmy demonstrated “United We Stand” for all the world to witness. The most entrenched, power hungry, godless money cartel continues to prove there is NO REDLINE they will not cross. Money is their god, and in pursuit of world domination, they will, and have done, anything for their god. Re-distributing power, rights, wealth and liberty from the sadistic few to all of mankind, from 2017 thru 2023, has perfectly illustrated this undeniable, immutable truth; “For the LOVE of money is the root of ALL evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows.” A more glorious, prosperous, abundant and free world awaits. The debt, tax, regulation, propaganda and war fighting robber barons of today have reached their ultimate demise. Merry Christmas, @X World. May faith, peace, joy, love, knowledge, understanding and wisdom reunite us all to live again on earth as it is in heaven. #KUWL
@TrumpDailyPosts - Donald J. Trump Posts From His Truth Social
MERRY CHRISTMAS! https://t.co/yhDCZgyMaY
Video Transcript AI Summary
I am honored to wish America and the world a merry Christmas. This season holds great significance for Christians as we celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ. His life has profoundly impacted various aspects of our lives, such as art, music, culture, and law. Christmas is a time to express gratitude for God sending his son to offer everlasting peace to humanity. It reminds us that the true spirit of Christmas lies in who we are as children of God. Let us be thankful and pray for blessings, joy, hope, and peace for every American family during this sacred season.
Full Transcript
Speaker 0: President of the United States, it's my tremendous honor to finally wish America and the world a very merry Christmas. For Christians, this is a holy season, the celebration of the birth of our lord and savior Jesus Christ. More than 2000 years ago, the angel Gabriel appeared to Mary. He said, do not be afraid. You have found favor with God.
The angel told her that she would give birth to a baby boy, Jesus, who would be called the son of the most high. 9 months later, Christ was born in the town of Bethlehem. The son of God came into the world in a humble stable. Whatever our beliefs, we know that the birth of Jesus Christ and the story of this incredible life Forever changed the course of human history. There's hardly an aspect of our lives today That his life has not touched art, music, culture, law, and our respect for the Sacred dignity of every person, everywhere in the world.
At Christmas, we give thanks to God, and that God sent his only son to die for us and to offer everlasting peace to all humanity. And we recognize that the real Spirit of Christmas is not what we have. It's about who we are. Each one of us As a child of God, that is the true source of joy this time of the year. That is what makes every Christmas merry.
Above all, during the sacred season, our souls are full of thanks and praise For almighty God, for sending us Christ, his son, to redeem the world. Tonight, we ask that God will continue to bless this nation, and we pray that he will grant every American family A Christmas season full of joy, hope, and peace.
@nbcsnl - Saturday Night Live - SNL
so which santa is it gonna be? https://t.co/jewdoJ6Tnd
Video Transcript AI Summary
Welcome to Santa's Village! This year, we have two Santas to choose from. Which one would you like for a cherished photo?
We want to see the white Santa, please.
Why two Santas? It cuts the wait time in half.
What should grandma do with the picture?
We just remembered we're Jewish.
Hi, we're here to meet Santa.
You can choose between two equally qualified Santas.
One Santa is busy, while the other is on a Zoom meeting.
I’ll wait for the busy one.
I’ll choose the Black Santa.
Please don’t call me Blanta.
It’s embarrassing that some can’t imagine Santa as anything but a straight white man.
Well, you’re in luck! Here’s Santa number three.
Hi! Ho ho ho!
Full Transcript
Speaker 0: Welcome to Santa's Village. Is everyone ready to get their picture taken with the big guy?
Speaker 1: Yep. It's Claire's first time.
Speaker 0: This year, we're doing something a little special. This year, we have 2 Santas to choose from. Hope. Hope. Poor New Year.
Oh, cool. All you gotta do is tell me which Santa you wanna go to.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry. What?
Speaker 0: Which Santa do you want your daughter to get a picture with? A picture you'll cherish for the rest of your life. So Santa number 1 or Santa number 2? What is your preference? I guess, I don't know.
The regular one. Regular? Regular as opposed to extra crispy? You're gonna need to be a little more specific than that. The white one.
What was that? Couldn't quite hear you. We want to see the white Santa Claus, please. That is shocking right this way. Who's next?
Speaker 1: Hi. Yeah. I'm sorry. Why are there 2 Santas?
Speaker 0: Well, it's the busiest time of year, and this cuts the wait time in half. Aren't you happy there's 2 Santas? Yeah. Much more convenient. Thank you for doing this to us.
Okay. Okay. Time to decide. What do you want grandma to do with the picture? Do you want her to put it on the fridge or in the garage?
We so what sand is it gonna be? We just remembered that we're Jewish. Come on, gang. Alright. Alright.
A and a Lew Wasserman to you too.
Speaker 1: Hi. We're here to meet Santa.
Speaker 0: Well, we've got 2 equally qualified Santas to choose from. Take your pick.
Speaker 1: I don't know. They, both seem great.
Speaker 0: Well, they're only well, you know, they are, but only one seems to be getting all the work. That's right. One Santa's been busy all day, and the other Santa is so free, he's on a Zoom meeting.
Speaker 1: Well, I don't want to interrupt his meeting, so we'll just wait for the other one. Okay. Well, I just want to say, I will be choosing the black Santa. I see you, Blanta.
Speaker 0: Blanta is not a thing. Please do not call me that.
Speaker 1: I am just so embarrassed by these small minded people who can't even imagine Santa being anything other than a straight white man. In fact, if there was a queer female Santa, I would choose them.
Speaker 0: Well, you're in luck because they're here. Say hi to Santa number 3.
Speaker 1: Hi. Ho ho ho.
@nbcsnl - Saturday Night Live - SNL
a simple secret santa gift, yet so much more https://t.co/I3V8u9VNzF
Video Transcript AI Summary
I made you into a Simpsons character using an app called Simsify.
That's hilarious! Thank you, Trevor. It's the best gift ever.
Next, I opened my gift—a jump rope. I panicked, but I like it, even if I can't use it for a while.
What would my job be in Springfield?
Maybe you're the medical director.
Wrong! I'm a dance teacher at Bart's school, and he likes me because I see potential in him.
I opened tampons—great, now I won't have to buy new pants.
I'd avoid Homer; he's not a good guy.
I think he hits Marge.
In my episode, Bart comes to my dance class upset, so I go to Marge and realize she's been hurt. I decide to find Homer, probably at Moe's with Barney.
Full Transcript
Speaker 0: Okay. What am I looking at?
Speaker 1: Well, not to out myself as your secret Santa, but I made you into a Simpsons character.
Speaker 0: You made me into a Simpsons character? So I'm, like, in the show now? Well,
Speaker 1: no. I just made it using an app called Simsify. You send in a photo, and they make it look like you're in the Simpsons.
Speaker 0: I've been Simsified. That that's hilarious. Thank you, Trevor. This is the best gift I've ever gotten in my life. Seriously.
Speaker 2: Okay. Guess I'll go next. Let's see what my secret Santa got me. Oh, a jump rope.
Speaker 0: I panicked.
Speaker 2: No. I like it. I'm just not totally sure that I can use it for another 7 months.
Speaker 0: Again, I'm really sorry. Question. What would my job be in Springfield?
Speaker 3: Carol? Maybe you're the medical director at a teaching hospital like you are in real life.
Speaker 0: Wrong.
Speaker 2: Wheels? My name is Susan.
Speaker 1: Well, in his defense, your name is Susan Wheels.
Speaker 2: Yeah. I just don't think he meant it that way, but, maybe you work with mister Burns.
Speaker 0: No. I'm a dance teacher at Bart's school, and Bart likes me because I see something in him.
Speaker 1: Cool, man. Yeah. That seems fine. I'm glad you're enjoying the gift.
Speaker 3: Okay. Can I do a gift now? I haven't opened mine yet. Tampons. Oh my god.
I've been meaning to try these. Now I won't have to keep buying new pants.
Speaker 0: I'll tell you who I'd like to avoid in Springfield, Homer, who is not a good guy.
Speaker 1: Oh, really? I don't know. I think he's kinda funny.
Speaker 0: So it's funny to drink all day and strangle your son and hit your wife? I
Speaker 1: don't think Homer hits Marge.
Speaker 0: In my episode, he does. In your episode of the Simpsons, Homer hits Marge? Well, that that's part of it. I mean, what else happens around? Come on.
Let's go around. What else happens in my episode?
Speaker 1: Maybe Milhouse gets a cool haircut and Bart gets jealous?
Speaker 0: That's good, but not for my episode. Let's save it for something else. Here's what I think happens. Here's what I think happens. Bart goes to my dance class, but he's got tears in his eyes.
Something's wrong at home. So I go see Marge, and I can tell somebody kicked her ass. You gotta tell chief Wiggum. Chief Wiggum is too stupid and fat. No.
I take matters into my own hands, so I go looking for Homer.
Speaker 1: Oh, he's probably at Moe's.
Speaker 0: He is. He's been drinking all night.
Speaker 2: Probably with his buddy, Barney.
Speaker 0: Yes, Wheels. You're on a roll. I don't love
Speaker 3: that.
@nbcsnl - Saturday Night Live - SNL
Office Christmas Party Extravaganza https://t.co/3Fa8I8CB1g
Video Transcript AI Summary
You've worked hard all year, and now it's time for the office Christmas party. At 5:45 PM, the drab office transforms slightly with music from Jason's laptop. Expect awkward moments, like the shy girl from marketing oversharing about her OnlyFans, and the guy who brought his kids. The food is soggy, and the secret Santa takes forever. Surprises include the cute accountant's unexpected boyfriend and drama between work wives and real wives. Laughter ensues as Damien and Ross dance on a desk, but the mood shifts when one falls. The cleaning staff looks annoyed, drinks are flowing, and HR complaints are brewing. But remember, it’s a Tuesday night, and everyone has work tomorrow.
Full Transcript
Speaker 0: You've been working hard all year. You've earned some time off. But first The most insane event of the year, your office Christmas party. 60 employees, 7 interns, all going hard
Speaker 1: in the same space
Speaker 0: they were working in 15 minutes ago. It all kicks off at 5:45 PM when your drab, boring office is utterly transformed into your same drab, boring office, but with the music turned off. Whoo. With music by Jason's laptop as soon as he could figure out how to pair a speaker with it.
Speaker 1: It says it's on. It says Bluetooth is on.
Speaker 0: With appearances by the shy girl from marketing who has one drink and reveals too much about herself.
Speaker 2: I actually make more on OnlyFans than I do here. It's just just feed stuff.
Speaker 0: And the guy who brought his kids.
Speaker 2: It's daddy's work.
Speaker 0: I immediately regrets it.
Speaker 1: I don't want him to move. Alright, buddy.
Speaker 0: Thirsty? Head over to the kitchen for an ice warm beer. Hungry? Enjoy a generous spread of the soggiest food you've ever seen. Show wet.
Then buckle up because just when you thought things couldn't get wilder, the action is brought to a screeching halt by data from sales and our 45 minute long secret, Santa.
Speaker 2: Who got Milton the Dunkin' gift card? Oh, Jason did. Yeah. Thank you, Jason. Okay.
You get to come on up. You get to come on up. Guys, we're almost done, so don't leave.
Speaker 0: And then a twist no one saw coming. The cute girl from accounting has a fat, quiet boyfriend.
Speaker 1: How did that happen?
Speaker 2: This is Kyle. We met at church.
Speaker 0: Ding ding ding. Mystery solved. Everyone will be buzzed, except for Nick who didn't finish his work at And watch the drama unfold when work wives and real wives collide.
Speaker 2: Oh my god. Your husband is such a character. Funny. Funny. I'm gonna get a drink.
Excuse me, guys. She's so pretty. Sorry. I wanna see your phone.
Speaker 1: Do not see him.
Speaker 2: I need to see your phone. There's nothing to hide. I need to see your phone.
Speaker 1: It's just it's just
Speaker 2: it's just Let me see the phone. Go.
Speaker 0: Go. Go. And don't forget off the chokers Damien and Ross who have the whole staff in stitches when they dance on a desk. Then have the whole staff in silence when one of them falls.
Speaker 1: And I need to go. I'm fine. I'm fine. It's no big
Speaker 0: deal. And don't know the party's lit if the cleaning staff looks super pissed off. Drinks will be drunk. HR complaints will be created. That someone here is getting a DUI.
But that's not what you think. And just when you thought the party couldn't rage any longer, it doesn't.
Speaker 1: Because it's Tuesday night, and,
Speaker 0: oh, y'all got work tomorrow. Your office Christmas party.
@nbcsnl - Saturday Night Live - SNL
2024 Christmas Joke Swap with Colin and Che! https://t.co/0uExTX8MHL
Video Transcript AI Summary
It's Christmas, and we have a tradition of sharing jokes live on air that we haven't seen before. I’m concerned about reading potentially offensive jokes, so I’ll try to navigate that carefully.
The first joke touches on Kamala Harris's support for reparations, humorously suggesting that white people deserve their money back for runaway slaves. Another joke discusses how women are more likely to orgasm when in tune with their bodies.
There’s a playful jab at Scarlett Johansson for her 40th birthday and a joke about having a child together.
The segment continues with various humorous remarks, including a joke about Costco removing roast beef sandwiches.
In closing, we wish everyone a good night.
Full Transcript
Speaker 0: It's Christmas, and we have a tradition here on Update. You're saying
Speaker 1: uh-huh. Yeah. Okay. Yeah.
Speaker 0: You're you're applauding now. We give each other jokes to read.
Speaker 2: Yeah. We're making each other read jokes live on air that the other person has never seen before.
Speaker 0: But time out. Before we do this, I know Michael is gonna make me tell some racist jokes like like he always does. So this time, if you don't mind, I'd like to read all the jokes in black voice so I don't so I don't get in trouble.
Speaker 2: I didn't call her. I don't mind. Do what you gotta do, man. I don't even know what black voice is. Weird you would bring that up.
Please, why don't you do the first joke?
Speaker 0: So sorry in advance.
Speaker 2: Oh, reverberations. I wonder what this is about.
Speaker 0: Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Y'all know my girl.
Yeah. Y'all know my girl, Kamala Harris, held held a town hall talking about she still supports the idea of slavery reparations. Well, damn, girl. Me too. Because white people deserve our money back for all those slaves that ran away.
Shiz. I ain't afraid of you mofos.
Speaker 2: Wow. I had no idea that's what you thought black voice was. A new study finds that women are more like likely to have an orgasm if they are in touch with their body signals such as heart rate and breathing as opposed to the women I have sex with who just hold their
Speaker 1: breath until they open. Oh my god.
Speaker 0: Why? I wanna dedicate this next joke to my boobs, Carla Johansson. Oh my gosh. She's so genuinely worried. Hey, boo.
Y'all know Scarlett just celebrated her 40th birthday, which which means I'm about to get up out of there.
Speaker 1: What? She is. What the heck? She is. She is.
Speaker 2: I think there's a little more.
Speaker 0: Oh, there's more. No. No. I'm just playing. We just had a kid together and y'all ain't seen no pictures of him yet because he black as hell.
Shit. Shit is I ain't afraid of you, mofos.
Speaker 1: Oh, shit.
Speaker 2: I ain't afraid of you, mofos. Continues to set records at the box office because like me and good luck, my good friend Jeffrey Epstein used to say, there's nothing like an island adventure with a teenage girl. I'm just kidding. I would never ever sleep with a girl as dark as Moana. And, hey, and, hey, before we go, I would be remiss if I didn't address the allegations of both Jay Z at those.
Speaker 1: No, man. No. No. No. No.
Speaker 2: Some people are afraid to talk about it, but not Mikey, the true mom Chase. So here so here it is. Jay z is innocent. He wasn't even at those parties and I know because I won. And Denny, if you're listening with Bad Boys to Life, when it comes to the charges against you, I'll say the same thing I always said at your parties.
I will help you off.
Speaker 0: Strange thing to say at a party, but wow. No. For real though. Costco Costco has removed the roast beef sandwich from its menu, but I ain't tripping. I've been eating roast beef every night since my wife had the kids.
No. No. I'm just playing, baby. You know I don't go downtown.
Speaker 1: Jeez.
Speaker 2: Oh my goodness. I can't believe you, Colin. Colin. For week of nothing, I am Michael Che. Oh my goodness.
Good night.
@KimDotcom - Kim Dotcom
My stroke recovery + seasons greetings. https://t.co/4Nytms5SdS
Video Transcript AI Summary
The speaker confirms the task: to make a video. After clarifying, they emphasize the instruction with repeated affirmations: “Make a video? Good. Good. Good. Good. Good.” They count steps—“One. One. Two. Position. Precision.” Then they ask, “Two. What are you celebrating? Are you beginning? Show us what you got.”
Full Transcript
Speaker 0: And do it. Do what? Make a video. Make a video? Good.
Good. Good. Good. Good. Good.
One. One. Two. Position. Precision.
Two. What are you celebrating? Are you beginning? Show us what you got.